


By Any Other Name

by RufusPrime54



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, romanogers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-30
Updated: 2020-10-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:08:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 24,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26730421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RufusPrime54/pseuds/RufusPrime54
Summary: Natasha has been known by many names in her life. This is her story. Written by forum and taking a completely different view of the MCU. Romanogers for those who are interested. OCs added for more fun. More details inside.
Relationships: Clint Barton/Laura Barton, Pepper Potts & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 1
Kudos: 29





	1. Prologue

**Prologue**

****

It was cold, or at least it was supposed to be. They were on the top of a mountain, hanging off the edge of a large cliff. The wind was blowing around and there was snow around.

So why wasn't she cold?

Probably because the adrenaline with what she was about to do fueled her veins more than anything in her life had before. As she hung off the edge of the cliff, knowing what would be in the next minute, she couldn't feel anything as trivial as cold.

"Damn you," Clint said, knowing he had lost.

He had tried to be the sacrifice, the last few years really taking a toll on him. But Natasha couldn't let him. He had a family, some of the people she loved most in this world. She couldn't leave them alone. Even with her only family without her, they would still be okay. Steve would make sure they were okay.

Oh Steve, the one thing she couldn't think about right now. If he entered her mind for longer than a second, she wouldn't be able to do it.

"Let me go," Natasha said to him, trying to convince herself just as much as Clint, and a tearful smile on her face.

"No, please, no," Clint said, trying to persuade her to do anything but, not wanting to lose his best friend. "Steve needs you. James needs you."

"They'll be okay," Natasha said, reaching up and securing a thumb drive and the chain around her neck with the dogtags and locket around them. "It's okay."

Without a second though, she kicked off of him, and broke free from his grasp. As she was falling, her life flashed by in a series of words. Natasha had been described as many things in her life. Orphan, spy, assassin, traitor, agent, Avenger, girlfriend, mother. She smiled at the memory of her two boys, the smile on their faces.

And then, nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to a new story! It has been a while since I wrote one that's for sure. Well, the last couple years I've gotten into the forums, and this story was actually written by a couple of different authors. A Velvet Rose, The Major Kusanagi, and SarahCon all wrote the characters aside from Natasha and some of the other ones I had a hold of. With their permission, I am recording Natasha story through those travels down here. This story is a lot different than the MCU is right now. Taking a lot of inspiration from the comics, this helps meld a pretty good retelling of the Black Widow through the MCU. A lot of the story is already written, but we're still going over on the forum, so at some point I will catch up and there will be a break between chapters. I'll let you know beforehand when that happens.
> 
> Look out for the first chapter, and you'll see a notable different already. Enjoy the show!


	2. Discovered

**Chapter 1: Discovered**

****

_Monday September 3rd, 2013_

_Washington DC_

The last 72 hours had left a very bad taste in Natasha's mouth. One second, she was in Costa Rica, working on dismantling an entire drug ring from the inside out, and the next she was getting an encrypted message from Maria Hill saying that Hydra had infiltrated Shield and that Fury was heavily injured and needed backup. She had made her way straight to DC and the coordinates given, ditching the rest of the Shield members that were on assignment with her because she couldn't trust one of them. When she found the bunker, Fury was barely conscious, so Hill filled her in on most things. The Lumerian Star, Hydra, Rogers, and the Winter Soldier. Her heart dropped at the mention of the Winter Soldier. Her past intertwined with the assassin and her experience with the Red Room. Plus the fact of his identity not being revealed to Rogers right away was devastating. She was very familiar with Steve Rogers. She was on guard detail with Coulson when he was brought out from the ice, overseeing the defrosting project and making sure that America's most treasured person was kept safe. When he awoke, she donned the photostatic veil to try and ease him back into things, which didn't work well at all. It was the last time she had spoken to Rogers, and he didn't even know who she was. She couldn't help what she was starting to develop, a small level of attraction.

Then New York happened. She wasn't there, and she was pissed at all hell because of it. She was on a mission in Russia, which was very important she knew. But an alien invasion came barreling into New York, and Fury called up the team, which was supposed to include her, but she got left hanging. She spent the next couple of months working missions and training recruits, seeing Steve in the halls of the Triskellion when he joined Shield, but never saying a word to him. She was sent on a long mission about a month ago that Fury felt that STRIKE didn't need to be involved with, and then this. The second after Hill finished explaining, she sent Natasha out on a medical supply run while Maria went to get Rogers and the rest of them. She hadn't any issue with her mission, a small local hospital was nearby and it was easy enough to swipe the supplies. She was sure that the doctors and nurses there would understand why if she was caught, she just knew it wasn't the right time to tell them, should they ever get in trouble. She was back at the bunker when she heard voices in the main area. She kept to the shadows and looked out to see Fury out sitting at the table with Hill, across from Steve Rogers, Terra Montgomery, and a man that Natasha didn't know.

Natasha recognized Terra easily. She was an Agent of Shield, known as the Knight. She was one of the Avengers that fought at New York and she was powered up, able to absorb any metal and cover it with her body, also enhancing herself with it. That came in handy when your notably best friend carried around a Shield with the strongest metal on Earth. She went on a mission with Montgomery once in her past, to Odessa. That was when they were both attacked by the Winter Soldier and barely made it out, failing in bringing the scientist back. After that, she refused to go on missions with Montgomery anymore, knowing that she didn't want her past to harm anyone else at Shield. Aside from her past, she knew only what she heard about the Knight. She helped Steve a lot after New York, started a relationship with Bruce Banner, was pretty decent friends of Tony Stark and Pepper Potts, all good things really.

"Why do you think we're meeting in this cave?" Fury said, interrupting her thoughts and holding his hands out at the less than luxurious hideout. "I noticed."

"Not soon enough," Natasha heard Terra murmuring around the straw of fluids that had been given to her. It appeared like she had a gunshot wound, probably from a fight with Hydra forces, maybe even the Winter Soldier.

"How many paid the price before you did?" Rogers said harshly, not missing a beat. He was pissed, about a lot of things Natasha could tell. His frustration and anger matched Natasha's own when she first heard about this. She decided now was the best time as any to make her return public to the rest of the group.

"He's right Fury," Natasha said, stepping out of the shadows. She tossed a large first aid kit on the table with a bang, the doctor that was probably working on Terra nearby scrambling up to grab in and look over what she had brought. He probably didn't have a lot to work with here to begin with. "I didn't trade the KGB for Hydra," Nat said, sitting down across from Hill.

Natasha could see that Terra and the man both jumped at her sudden entrance, and even Steve looked suprised. Terra nearly spilled her drink.

"Holy shit," she gaped, her straw falling out of her mouth.

The man just looked confused, obviously never meeting her before and if he had known Montgomery for any point in time, Natasha wasn't exactly a talking point. "Uh, who's that?" he asked sideways to Terra.

" _That_ is Natasha Romanoff," she replied in an excited whisper. "She could kill you with a toothbrush."

The man contemplated that for a moment. "...Hairbrush?"

"Dead."

"Teddy-bear."

"Dead."

"Floss."

"Now you're just making it easy for her."

They continued to bicker/whisper while Fury just sighed and tried to refocus the group. "Captain, Agent Natasha Romanoff, can we get back to the matter at hand here?" Nick looked back at Steve and then dropped a bomb that hit Natasha hard. "Look, I didn't know about Barnes."

So Rogers knew the identity of the Winter Soldier, and by the looks of it, he found out by himself. Rogers didn't even address her, as the mention of the named made him even more upset than he already was. Fury was definitely on a roll here with making the greatest soldier of all time very upset with him.

"Even if you did, would you have told me? Or would you have compartmentalized that too?" Steve spat, not sparing any mercy at this. Natasha was actually getting a kick out of Fury being chewed out and having to sit and take it. "SHIELD, Hydra, it all goes."

While Fury and Steve were hashing it out, Natasha leaned over to Terra. "How are you doing kid?" she asked quietly, worrying about a gunshot wound that she didn't know anything about.

Terra gave a shrug with her good shoulder, and Natasha could tell that she was trying to hold something back. Whether it was admiration or surprise, Natasha couldn't tell. "Ah, you know how it is. I would rather go on about my day without being shot in the shoulder, but beggars can't be choosers, eh?"

Natasha's attention was brought back to the other conversation when Fury's right hand, possibly his most trusted agent Maria Hill uttered two words. "He's right," she gave a small smile, agreeing with Rogers and basically giving her permission to end Shield.

Nick looked at Sam and Terra.

"Don't look at us," Terra mumbled around her straw.

"We do what he does, just slower," Sam finished.

"And with a lot more complaining."

Natasha saw it in Fury's face, he was beat. He had nowhere to go, and no way to get out of this. But Natasha knew better, and Fury wouldn't take this lying down. He already had a secret team that the Avengers didn't know about. How do you keep the resurrection of Phil Coulson from the Avengers without them making a huge uproar, well you just don't tell them and let him work in secret with his own team. She had been asked to think about joining, but she outright refused to even consider until Fury told the Avengers about Coulson, which he refused to do as well. So, they hit a standstill.

Fury sighed and looked back at Steve. "Well, looks like you're giving the orders now, Captain."

Natasha saw Steve deflate just a little bit. Might not have been noticeable for anyone else, but she saw it plain as day. Now that he won this small battle, his mind obviously went back to other things, and Natasha could guess who was at the front. Squaring his shoulders, Steve returned to holding his head high. "From here on out, we are not affiliated with SHIELD. We are just people trying to stop something very bad from happening. We are Avengers." He sent Terra a little secret smile. "We may not be able to search every carrier for innocent SHIELD agents, but we can get them to run or help if we can get them a message. Terra, Sam, Maria, and I will head to the Triskelion and access the P.A. system, broadcast a message to every shield agent in DC. If they make it out, great. If they help us, even better. Maria will stay behind to keep watch over surveillance and activate the virus once it's been planted into every carrier. Terra, Sam, and I will each take a chip and work on a separate carrier. Pierce is going to try to stop us. He's having a meeting with the World Security Council tonight. We have to infiltrate that meeting and make sure Pierce doesn't get away. We'll need his access code to hack into the SHIELD database. I want every secret SHIELD ever told, and the ones it never did, on the Internet. No more hiding. No more compartmentalization. No more working from the shadows." He turned to Natasha then, and looked her right in the eye "Miss Romanoff? Would you be up to the task?"

Natasha was suddenly hit with a fit of dread at what her orders were. Dump everything on the internet, and expose her very bloody past. She had given Shield a lot when she defected, and she knew that those files were behind a high level of clearance. But to give Shield that much, she had to sacrifice her own secrets as well. And while her deal absolved herself of those crimes with the other information and the contract to work with Shield, the rest of the American people may not be so kind. "I don't know Captain," Natasha said carefully. "There are a lot of things that SHIELD has on me that would make others very angry. My past isn't the cleanest, well that's an understatement. There will be an arrest warrant out for me for sure if I do this. With SHIELD compromised, I don't have anywhere to turn. My web is in flames because of Hydra."

"I understand that," Rogers said, equally careful. "But if we don't do this, Hydra can crawl back into the shadows. It can masquerade as SHIELD. Everyone gets confused. Who's SHIELD? Who's Hydra? Who can I trust? This is the best way to get Hydra - we cut off their biggest head, maybe even their heart, and hope it will be enough. I'm sorry, Natasha, but if you need a place to lay low, I know Avengers Tower will be open to you. No one would ever suspect it either. And if Mr. Stark has a problem with that, he can take it up with me."

Natasha's ears perked at Rogers calling her by her first name. Not many people did that, especially after having just met her. Not that she allowed it most of the time, but with Rogers it felt different. For one of the first times in her life, she felt like she could trust someone she just met. Some might say it was cheating because this person was Captain America, but she was going to count it nonetheless. "Avengers Tower huh," Natasha said with a smirk. "Well the last time I spoke to Stark he wasn't too happy about finding out who I was, but if I can get under his skin that way, then I'm in. Besides, it will be nice to take orders from someone older than me for once, if only by ten years."

One of the things that Natasha had kept from even the Shield files was her actual birth date. For the records, she was born in December of 1984, but in actuality, she was born in December of 1929. She was orphaned in World War 2, brought to the Red Room and trained, and given a version of the Super Soldier serum. Weaker than Rogers and the Red Guardian for sure, and even weaker than the Winter Soldier, but enough to slow her aging and give her slightly enhanced abilities.

"Mr. Stark is currently... away on business." Rogers said, obviously having trouble finding the words to explain Stark's situation. "I'll make sure to explain the situation to him when he comes back." He offered Natasha a small, reassuring smile. "Going undercover as one of the council would probably be most effective. I'll leave that part up to you, since this is what you do best." He returned his attention to everyone else in the room. "Is everyone clear on the plan?"

Terra also looked uncomfortable when the plan was to reveal everything on the internet. Natasha knew a bit about Terra's past and what was in her file, and it wasn't overly pretty, but she fought through it. "Yup," Terra popping the p.

"Wait, wait," the other man looked skeptically at her. "You can't do any fighting or chip-placing with that shoulder, I wouldn't let you lift a potato chip."

Terra waved him off. "If I put my armor over it, I'll be fine," she assured. "Good as gravy." Then she paused in silence for a moment and wrinkled her nose before looking at Fury. "You! I don't care how good of a reason it is," she slammed her gatorade bottle down on the table next to her and set her clenched hands down in her lap, her eyes piercing at Nick's. "Screw you for letting me think you were dead, Nick!" Fury was silent at that and at least had the decency enough to look a little ashamed at one of his secrets that genuinely hurt someone. "Yeah, that's what I thought!" Terra grumbled.

Natasha nodded as well, a plan forming in her mind on how to infiltrate, and actually being inspired by Steve in the room. Specifically the first time she met him. "You still have a Photostatic Veil lying around," Natasha asked Fury, wanting to make sure she didn't have to make another supply run before all of this.

"In the backroom. You should all gear up on whatever you need," Fury said and then Rogers left the room. Natasha could tell he had some thinking to do and it wasn't her place to go and talk to him at this point. Natasha started walking back towards the direction Fury pointed her in. Natasha began getting into the mission mode, gathering her equipment and looking for the Veil. She finally found one and had to dust off the cover of it. She was skeptical of it really working, but she didn't have much of a choice at this point. Nat made her way back into the main room, completely restocked on ammo and supplies. She was also carrying the box with the veil in it, getting ready to start calibrating it to the certain member on the world security council she was thinking of. She had to find out one thing first. She walked over to Fury and sat down in front of him and asked him straight away.

"Nick," Natasha said. "I need you to be honest with me. Completely honest. How many missions that I carried out were Hydra's. How many times did Pierce or someone else send me to do Hydra's bidding?"

He looked up at her approach and sat back, folding his hands together. He closed his one eye, and let out a breath. "As many times as me." He opened his eye to stare her down. "As many times as Montgomery. As many times as all the other agents of SHIELD because every operation we had? They had their own. Not every operation had... evil backgrounds or they would have been found out much sooner, but..." Nick sighed and shook his head. "It's impossible to tell. Not until everything had been spilled out." Then Fury seemed to harden himself. Now wasn't the time for a pity party, and Natasha knew that. He leaned forward and locked eyes with one of his best agents. "I may not be your boss anymore. But I need you to turn your back on what you _did_ and focus on what you're _going_ to do."

Natasha closed her eyes and clenched her fist that wasn't holding the veil. She wanted to yell some more, and wanted to say that she put faith into this organization and it crushed her and everything she was trying to undo. But she had a job to do and start to fix things again. "Fine," she relented. "But I'm not naïve like Rogers. I know you are going to reestablish Shield in some fashion. I'm out. This is the last time I'll take my orders from you."

Fury gave a terse, "Understood." And Natasha stood up, keeping her rock steady glare at him. "You need to find a helicopter and land outside the World Security Council floor," Natasha said. "Bring my suit and don't you be late." Without waiting for a response, she walked out of the room and headed towards her objective.

++++++

_Ronald Regan National Airport_

Natasha arrived at the airport and donned a striped hoodie and skinny jeans. Hydra could be anywhere at this point, and she didn't want to alert them that she was working with Rogers to take down Shield. She sat down outside the terminal that the councilwoman was set to arrive and just waited. She grabbed a magazine that had an interesting headline on it and began reading. It was about Stark and how he hadn't been seen in a while. Natasha chuckled as she thought of Stark's face when she showed up with Rogers to Stark tower to live there. She looked up and saw the council woman exiting the terminal and pushed that thought to the back of her mind. There would be time to brood later, right now she had a job to do. She tailed the group for about five minutes, to baggage claim and back. Just before they were about to leave the airport, the councilwoman stopped and turned towards the bathroom.

"I'll be right back," the council woman said and she was followed closely by a female guard.

Natasha walked forward and hid her face from the other guards standing outside, and ducked into the bathroom. She looked in and saw the stall that was holding the council woman, and the guard that was posted just outside. She walked behind the guard, all the while pulling her garrot out of her wrist gauntlet. Once she was safely past, she pulled the cord tight and spun around, wrapping it around the guard's neck. It only took a few seconds to knock out the guard, and once she did, she stuffed the guard in a closet and locked the door. Natasha turned back to the stall and waited for the council woman to finish.

The council woman flushed the toilet and stepped out and immediately met Natasha's eyes. Natasha moved forward in a flash, and pushed the council woman inside the stall and locked the door.

"Do you know who I am," Natasha said, taking down her hood.

"Agent Romanoff," the council woman said in realization.

"Very good," Natasha said. "Now, I don't have a lot of time, but here is the deal, Hydra has infiltrated SHIELD. Captain Rogers is innocent and is headed to the Triskellion right now to shut down Project Insight."

"How do you know about Project Insight?" the council woman demanded.

Natasha just raised one of her eyebrows and the council woman realized it was a stupid question and started putting the pieces together. "If Hydra has control of those helicarriers, that means..."

"You, I, and millions of others are dead," Natasha said, finishing for her. "Now Captain Rogers has a plan, but that includes me impersonating you, and infiltrating the Triskellion right under Hydra's nose."

"Why do you need to do that?" the council woman asked.

"Rogers wants all of the Shield files dumped on the internet," Natasha said.

The council woman was about to protest when Natasha silenced her with a glare, "these are the Captain's orders. You can either go along willingly, or I can force you."

The council woman thought and finally nodded. "What do you need me to do?"

"Put this on," Natasha said, handing her the veil. "And I'll need your clothes, don't worry I brought spares."

The council woman nodded and put on the veil. Natasha pressed a few buttons on the side and she could see the veil begin to calibrate to the council woman's face. The council woman began to take her clothes off as Natasha produced another pair.

"You are going to wait in here for an hour," Natasha instructed. "Then you are going to take a cab to the Capitol building. They should be able to take care of you there."

The council woman nodded and Natasha shredded her clothes, her scars showing to one of the few people that will get to see them. She quickly grabbed the council woman's clothes and slipped them on. They were a tad big on her, due to her small frame, but nothing noticeable. She then gently pulled the veil off of the council woman's face and put it on her own. The council woman was in shock as soon as the veil adjusted to Natasha's features and displayed the council woman's face.

"Remember what I said," Natasha said.

"You are a good agent," the council woman said, as Natasha began to walk out.

Natasha stopped and looked back. "I'm not an agent anymore." With that, she walked out of the stall and out of the bathroom. When she emerged, she was met with curious looks.

"Where is Agent Danbury," a man asked her.

"She was feeling sick," Natasha said. "Said she would meet us at the Triskellion and to go on without her."

The men found that acceptable and continued on. Natasha followed in their ranks, staying calm and remembering her training. They exited the airport and found the car waiting for them. One of the guards opened the door for her and she stepped inside, settling in the back seat.

"Is there any place you need to go first Ma'am," the driver asked.

"No," Natasha responded. "Continue on as usual."

The driver nodded and began to drive towards the Triskelion, and towards Hydra.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's chapter one. Uploads probably won't be this frequent, but I wanted to get a good size chapter for you after a shorter prologue to give you a good idea on the style of writing. Next up, the Battle for DC. Contributors to this chapter were A Velvet Rose and SarahCon.


	3. Saboteur

The ride to the Triskellion was quiet, and Natasha had to admit to herself deep down that she was a little nervous. Her mission itself was very simple. Infiltrate the area and seize information and dump it on the internet. The biggest wild card was Hydra. She knew Pierce was Hydra and could guess a decent amount of the top soldiers were too, but she didn’t know who else. Was anyone on the Security Council?

There was also the fact that Rogers was going to be here with the rest of the team soon, and when they made their presence known, there was going to be a lot of noise and she was going to have a very small window to get what she needed to done.  The car arrived at the Triskelleton, and Natasha could tell something was different. There was more tension in the air. More of a rush. She was guessing this was something to do with either Project Insight or Rogers making a mess of things. Or possibly both. The car pulled to a stop just outside the front building and she allowed the door to be opened for her. She stepped out and saw Pierce walking towards them. She wanted nothing more than to put two bullets right between his eyes, but she had to bide her time. She needed him anyway for her plan. She put on her best Councilwoman face as Pierce approached. The rest of the Council had also gathered the three other members that would be accompanying her and that she would have to keep safe, provided they weren’t Hydra.

"Council. A pleasure to have you all here. Welcome to the Triskelion," Pierce greeted and then gestured to the front doors. "Shall we?"

"It's impressive," Councilman Yen commented on the architecture, looking up at the building.

"That's thanks to the greatest SHIELD engineers and architects you'll ever see," Pierce replied modestly as they walked in the building. "And how was your flight?" He asked Councilwoman Hawley.

"Lovely," Natasha said, sizing Pierce up. "The ride from the airport, less so." She had only seen Pierce for a few times. She knew almost everything about him, but that came with the job. She had almost memorized his file, but she really couldn't trust anything that was written there. Hydra had infested everything and probably all records were falsified.

Pierce appeared to remain civil, but Natasha could see him bristle a bit. "Sadly, SHIELD can't control everything."

"Including Captain America," Councilman Rockwell said snidely. Definitely didn’t help his mood, but he still let it go. They walked up to a guard who held open a case with the rigged pins. "This facility is biometrically controlled, and these will give you unrestricted access," Pierce explained, gesturing them each to take a pin. Rockwell, Singh, and Yen each took a pin. Natasha knew there was something fishy about those pins. They had never used those before when other high ranking officials visited the Triskelion. The problem was that the rest of the council didn't bat an eye and just grabbed them. Natasha didn't have much of a choice as she also grabbed a pin and placed it on her lapel.

They took the walk over to the elevator, passing numerous armed guards along the way. Natasha took in every detail that she could, possible escape routes, guard posts, potential suspicious activity. There was just so much to take in with so much unknown. They all took the elevator to the usual conference room and Pierce had someone bring in a bottle of champagne and some glasses. He could still feel some glares at his back, that was expected. He has pulled some rebellious stunts for the "greater good," but now was the time to gain back that trust. "I know the road hasn't exactly been smooth," he admitted after pouring the champagne and handing out the glasses. "And some of you would have gladly kicked me out of the car along the way." That earned a slight smile from Rockwell.

"Finally we're here," Pierce raised his glass with a glint in his eye. "And the world should be grateful.

They were about to drink, and Natasha was too, when the intercom went off. Already she knew that Rogers was successful in infiltrating where he needed. "Attention all SHIELD agents," Rogers said. "This is Steve Rogers. You may have heard a lot about me in the last few days. Some of you were even ordered to hunt me down... and I think it's time you know the truth. SHIELD is not what we thought it was. It's been taken over by Hydra. Alexander Pierce is their leader.”

That earned a look from the Council over to Pierce, clearly wanting an explanation as even if Rogers was a technical fugitive of Shield, his word always carried some weight. In the most honest response she had ever seen from Pierce in her few encounters with him, he just shrugged.

“The STRIKE and INSIGHT crew are Hydra as well. I don't know how many more. But I know they're in the building. They could be standing right next to you. They almost have what they want: absolute control. They shot Nick Fury. And it won't end there. If you launch those helicarriers today, Hydra will be able to kill anyone that stands in their way. Unless we stop them. I know I'm asking a lot. The price of freedom is high. It always has been. And it's a price I'm willing to pay. And if I'm the only one, then so be it. But I'm willing to bet I'm not." 

She had heard rumors on the inspiration that Steve Rogers could inspire, but to witness it first hand was something else. It’s almost as if he practiced it beforehand. She didn’t know it at the time, but she fell a little bit more for Steve Rogers at that moment, and it certainly gave her a small confidence boost in what was to come.

"You smug son of bitch," Councilman Rockwell snapped in slight disbelief, but summing up the feelings of the Council appropriately. And right on cue, two Hydra agents marched in. But Signh thought they were SHIELD. "Arrest him," he ordered, pointing at Pierce. Singh was sorely mistaken. The agents point their guns at the council, not including Pierce. Alexander smiled. "I guess I've got the floor."

She was watching Pierce's every move now, knowing that he had a trump card hidden somewhere, he was too smart and prepared to not have one. She knew that she would make sure to have a safeguard in a situation like this. She kept analyzing when she started to hear explosions from outside. She glanced out the window to see the three INSIGHT Helicarriers rising from the Potomac. And they were all currently firing at something, looking like a man in a wingsuit. It had to be Wilson, who she was quickly filled in on by Terra before she left to collect the Councilwoman’s face scan. She held back a smile, as she knew the three were now in the fight and possibly causing a thorn in Pierce’s side.

"Let me ask you a question," Pierce began, stepping away from the window and moving towards Sing. "What if Pakistan marched into Mumbai tomorrow, and you knew that they were gonna drag your daughters into a soccer stadium for execution?" He handed Councilman Sing a glass of champagne. "And you could just stop it with a flick of a switch. Would you? Wouldn't you all?" He addressed the rest of the room. Sing held the champagne glass tightly in his hand, his stare unwavering at Pierce. "Not if it was  _ your _ switch," he bit out, tossing the glass to the floor where it shattered. Pierce let out a disappointed sign and held his hand out to one of the Hydra agents. The agent put a handgun in his palm. Pierce raised the gun and Sing stared down the barrel of it.

_ Der'mo _ ," Natasha thought.  _ Well, it's now or nothing. _

Natasha quickly kicked Sing out of the way and then grabbed the arm that Pierce was holding his gun in and jabbed him quickly in the face. On her right, a Hydra agent pulled out his sidearm, but he wasn't fast enough. Natasha flung one of her widow's bites at him, dropping him to the ground. She ripped the gun out of Pierce's hand and flung it at another Hydra agent, hitting him square in the throat. She pushed Pierce away and took on another agent, taking him down with a quick jab to the throat, a kick to the knee, and then using her enhanced strength to pick him up and immediatly slam him to the ground. She turned to find another Hydra goon turning to face her with his sidearm. She quickly grabbed his arm and slammed his head down on the table, knocking him out cold. She turned around to find the last Hydra agent standing and grabbed his arm that was holding his pistol and turned him around, elbowing him in the back and then slamming him to the ground in one motion, effectively taking him out.

She grabbed a fallen pistol off the ground and raised up pointing it at Pierce. She ignored the stunned looks from the rest of the council and stared down Pierce, not even breathing hard.

"Secretary Pierce," Natasha said.

She pressed a button on the side of the veil she was wearing and her voice started to change back as the veil turned off. She peeled the veil off, revealing her own face and took off the wig she was wearing, revealing her trademark red locks. The look of recognition on Pierce's face was one of confusion and disbelief. True she had kept a low profile, only carrying out certain missions for Fury the past couple months since New York. He probably was more focused on the Avengers anyway, considering her not a threat. Well, he probably didn't know her complete story, but now that she just took down a whole room of Hydra thugs, he probably was a little worried.

"I'm sorry," Natasha said, with a smirk. "Did I step on your moment?"

Natasha directed the other Councilmembers to grab the guns and make sure Pierce didn’t make any moves. She wanted him dead for what he did, but she needed him alive. She secured the thugs on the ground and then made her way over to the computer terminal. Natasha began typing furiously on the keyboard to the master computer in front of her. In the background, she could hear the explosions of the helicarriers that were currently raising out of the river, and she knew her time was limited. Now, she was working on dumping all of Shield's information on the internet. Numerous topics popped up, some that she knew about, and then the very few that didn't. The Raft, Roger's file, New York details, all of it. She stopped abruptly when she came to the next set of files. Her files. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.  _ Let's hope Rogers doesn't retract his deal _ Nat thought and kept powering through, spewing information upon information on the net.

"What are you doing?" Councilman Rockwell inquired at Natasha, looking at the screen. Pierce stepped forth, hands still up and guns still trained on him. "She's disabling security protocols and dumping all the secrets onto the Internet." 

"Including HYDRA's," Natasha said cooly, getting to the really fun stuff. All of the black ops missions that HYDRA had ever carried out was on here, and Natasha would enjoy reading about them later. She was happy to note that she had only been in a few of these, unaware of the true goal obviously, but still pissed that she did missions for a secret Nazi death cult that had been presumed dead in 1945.

"And SHIELD's," Pierce pointed out. "If you do this, none of your past is gonna remain hidden. Are you sure you're ready for the world to see you as you really are?"

Natasha hesitated for a moment. He was right. While Rogers did say that she could stay with them, there was a higher percent chance that she could end up in a prison for the things she had done. Her dealings with the Red Room and the KGB would certainly make her an enemy of the United States. Hell, what she did to Stark wouldn't work out well. With the spying she did on him for the recruitment for Shield, and the fact that she helped deliver Ho Yinsen to a terrorist group in her last days as a KGB operative. She glanced up at Pierce and looked into his deceiving eyes. While he did make a point, he was also the enemy. Responsible for thousands of deaths, and if they did not succeed today, millions. She wasn't going to be responsible for that anymore. Even if it brought her down, she would go down doing the right thing.

With a coy smile, she fired right back at Pierce. "Are you?"

"Disabling the encryption is an executive order, it takes two Alpha Level members," Pierce informed her, unable to hide the hint of satisfaction in his voice. 

Natasha knew she would be denied. Honestly, if Pierce thought she was this dumb around hacking and security systems then the rest of Hydra would go down easily. "Don't worry," Natasha said, an equal amount of smugness in her voice. "Company is coming."

As if on cue, the sound of a helicopter grew gradually that made Pierce and the Councilmen turn around towards the helicopter pad outside. Sure enough, a military-grade helicopter kissed the ground and Natasha smiled internally. A figure exited the helicopter, one arm close to his chest and striding towards the door. And sure enough, Nicholas J. Fury walked through those doors with the tail of that damn black leather trench coat whipping in the wind behind him.

"Did you get my flowers?" Pierce managed to say. Silence. "I'm glad you're here Nick."

That changed Fury's expression to look annoyed as hell. "Really? Cause I thought you had me killed."

"You know how the game works."

"So why make me head of SHIELD?"

"Cause you're the best and the most ruthless person I know," Alexander said honestly.

Nick's eye almost twitched. "I did what I did to protect people."

"Our enemies are your enemies, Nick. Disorder, war. It's just a matter of time before a dirty bomb goes off in Moscow, or an EMP fries Chicago. Diplomacy? Holding action, a band-aid. And you know where I learned that; Bogota."

Fury didn’t say anything to that as well and Natasha knew the rough details about the Bogota mission. Where Fury disobey direct orders to save a bunch of people. Learning about that case is what made Natasha able to at least take orders from Fury, even if she didn’t trust him all the way.

"You didn't ask, you just did what had to be done,” Pierce continued. “I can bring order to the lives of seven billion people by sacrificing twenty million. It's the next step, Nick, if you have the courage to take it."

Fury glared hard. "No. I have the courage  _ not to."  _ He grabbed his old friend's arm to lead him to the retinal scanner. Natasha hit the activation for the clearance test and picked up her own handgun and trained it on Pierce, making sure that he would confirm their authentication. The screen activated at their presence.  _ "Retinal scanner active." _

Pierce looked at him like he was joking. "You don't you think we wiped your clearance from the system?"

"I know you erased my password, probably deleted my retinal scan, but if you want to stay ahead of me, Mr. Secretary..." he lifted his eye patch. "You need to keep both eyes open."

They both leaned forward, Pierce looking a bit stunned about something that they actually managed to miss, and almost in disbelief that it actually worked and the computerized voice that came out.

_ "Alpha Level confirmed. Encryption code accepted. Safeguards removed." _

Natasha, lowering the gun she had on Pierce slightly, looked at her phone and Googled Shield and kept the giant smile that she wanted to spread across her face, but she needed to keep her cool. "Done," Natasha said smoothly. "And it's trending."

The distraction on checking her phone proved to be very costly.

The council members suddenly convulsed as their pins activated and burned at their sternums, sending them unconscious to the ground. "Unless you want a two inch hole in your sternum, I'd put that gun down," Pierce said to Natasha, holding his phone with his thumb over a button that would certainly activate her pin. "It was armed the moment you pinned it on." His finger hovered over the button threateningly.

Natasha had the gun leveled right at him. She didn't flinch with the threat, but she cursed herself for being so stupid.  _ I should have trusted my gut on those things,  _ Natasha thought.  _ I knew they were trouble.  _ Natasha thought about putting the gun down, but she didn't. She didn't have much of a family left, only really a decent friendly relationship with Clint and his family. Coulson was a dear friend until his death. Fury was Fury, and she tolerated Hill. She had done the job she came here to do, and that was expose Hydra. She knew the risks that came with it, and if she could get a shot off while he pressed that button, she was surely going to take it. She glanced at Fury quickly, almost as if to send a message to shoot him in the head while he took her down.

Fury looked at her very apologetically almost, and it threw Natasha off. He slowly lowered his gun and gave Natasha the same look that she should do the same. She really didn’t think she was worth it, but she had already begun planning on her next move. But Rogers needed to get those Helicarriers neutralized now.

"Lieutenant, how much longer?" he asked in the computer's communication, moving over to the terminal while keeping both Fury and Natasha at gunpoint, finger still close to the button on his phone.

"Sixty-five seconds to satellite link. Target reengaged. Lowering weapons array now," Natasha could hear the Hydra agent respond, knowing that they were almost out of time.

Natasha watched helplessly now as the battle on the Helicarriers ensued. She had to hope that Rogers did his job now that she did hers. She didn't know if she would make it out of this one. Her coming plan was risky, but for some reason, she was okay. Getting approval from Captain America had to mean something, right? Out of all the bad she did, she knew she did a good job for America's symbol of freedom.

Just before the time was out, the Helicarriers seemed to stop as all of their guns rearranged and started to point at each other. Natasha knew the mission was a success at that point, and it only cemented in the fact as they started to fire on each other, causing mass destruction.

"What a waste," Pierce said scowling at the window.

Natasha smirked as the mission was successfully completed. The threat of Project Insight was neutralized and everyone was safe. There was only one thing to take care of. She had to find out how to get Fury to shoot Pierce. She had an idea. It was a long shot, but if she hit herself with one of her widow bites, it would maybe short circuit the chip long enough for Fury to get an opening. While Pierce was focused on the helicarriers, Natasha began working one of the bites from her gauntlet on her right wrist.

Pierce nudged her in the back with the pistol towards the landing platform and helicopter. "Time to go, Councilwoman. This way, come on. You're gonna fly me out of here." 

Fury just looked out the window with a bittersweet satisfaction. "You know, there was a time I would have taken a bullet for you."

"You already did. And you will again-" Pierce started before Natasha seized the opportunity.

With Pierce distracted with his small banter with Fury, Natasha brought her Widow bite up and activated it on herself.  _ Oh shit _ , Natasha thought as pain radiated through her body. She dropped to the ground, hoping she woke up without a hole in her chest, before losing consciousness.

A few minutes later, she was roused slightly with someone saying her name. She opened her eyes to see Fury looking over her with some actual concern. If her entire body still didn’t hurt, she would have chuckled at the expression. Instead, she groaned. "Wow," Natasha grumbled, still feeling the effect of the widow bite. "Those really do sting."

She sat up and glanced over to see Pierce with two bullet holes in his chest and dead on the floor. Good riddance. She got up and headed with Fury to the helicopter, knowing that they needed to get out of here and fast.

Fury was flying the chopper around the Triskelion as the last helicarrier started shredding it to bits. Natasha had already changed back into her Black Widow uniform, the red hourglass shining on her belt. She had a radio on and listened to Sam.

"We are on our way," Natasha yelled. "Stay there!"

Natasha was about to ask where Rogers was when she saw a figure drop from the helicarrier. It was feminine in form.  _ Shit, _ Natasha thought as she zipped her suit all the way up. Natasha grabbed a small breathing apparatus she had in her belt and turned towards Fury.

"Someone dropped from the helicarrier," she shouted. "Get Sam and wait for my tracking signal."

Before Fury could argue, she jumped out of the helicopter and into the water below. As she was on her way down, she knew she would survive. she jumped from higher spots before. She entered the water with a giant splash and headed right towards the person that dropped. she found Terra on the bottom of the Potomac and grabbed her, swimming towards the shore and hoping that Terra wasn't dead. Natasha dragged Terra out of the water and started to go over her injuries. First and foremost, making sure she was alive. She checked her pulse and found a weak one.

"Okay," Natasha said, wiping the hair out of her face. "Let's get you fixed up kid."

Natasha started to patch up Terra's more serious injuries and try to stabilize her before calling the medics. Natasha heard the slogging of water behind her and wheeled, bringing up her pistol in the process. What she saw was something she never thought that she would see. Steve was being drug through the water, with injuries that would kill a normal person. She was definitely worried about that and would take care of it as soon as possible. What she didn't expect was who was carrying him.

"James?" Natasha asked, lowering the gun slightly.

She saw a faint hint of recognition on the face of the Winter Soldier. She knew what they did to him each time they brought him out of the ice, but the fact that he was helping Steve at the moment and not killing him made her think that he was gaining something back. And her past was intertwined with his as well.  He raised his arms in a sign of peace, obviously not wanting to pose a threat. He nodded at Steve. "Take care of him."

Natasha knew what he was going through. All of her time with the Red Room, her brain was jumbled all up. She could only imagine what he was going through was ten times worse. She holstered his weapon and came over to grab Steve.

"Go," she said, before working on Rogers.

She dragged Steve next to Terra and started to go over his wounds. It didn't look good. He had a nasty shot to the stomach that could prove fatal.

"C'mon Rogers don't you die on me," Natasha said. "I don't want to lose the leader of the Avengers because of my shitty patch jobs."

She took out her radio and called all of her frequencies. "This is Agent Romanoff," Natasha said. "I have Captain Rogers and Agent Montgomery on the bank opposite the Triskelion. Both are in dire need of medical attention, does anyone copy?"

"This is Agent Hill, I copy. I'll send medical your way. What's your location?" Natasha heard through the frequency and sighed in relief. She was about to answer when she heard sputtering from Rogers. He opened his eyes widely and tried to find his surroundings. She placed herself firmly in his view, hoping that a familiar face would at least calm him down.

He coughed. "R-Romanoff?" His eyes flickered, darting back and forth and around. "Where's-?" He vomited more water off to the side.

"I'm activating my tracking beacon," Natasha said through comms, getting help on the way first. "Get here fast Hill."

Natasha turned back to Rogers, trying to help him through this. "Rogers lay back down," she commanded as he tried to sit up. "You have multiple bullets through you. Just relax and wait for the medics."

She comforted him the best she could and she heard a helicopter land a bit behind her and sirens blaring. There were EMTs all around a second later, and Natasha stood up and let them do their work. She made her way over to where Wilson and Fury were standing, decently covered with Steve and Terra's blood. She breathed a sigh of relief and looked at the damage that was caused to the Triskelleton. "Shit," Natasha said. "My cell phone was still in my office."

Sam went over to talk to Steve and Natasha took a second to gather her thoughts. The battle was over. Everyone was accounted for and alive. They won. The Triskelion was in shambles and who knew the number of casualties, but she knew they were for the better off. Right? After she let Steve and Sam have a moment, she walked over to make sure he was okay herself.

“Feel like shit,” she managed to hear Steve say at the tail end of their conversation.

Natasha came over to survey the rest of his injuries and huffed. "You'll be fine Rogers," she said, trying to lighten the mood. "With that serum in you, you'll be healed within the week."Natasha placed a hand on his shoulder and leaned down to whisper in his ear, this wasn’t information that anyone else should hear. "James is fine," she said before standing up. "Anything you need?" she asked.

He squinted up at her, trying to see through the sunlight. There was no hint of a lie on her face, and she saw that he knew she was telling the truth about James. His features relaxed and he slumped into the stretcher the paramedics were maneuvering him into. "I need a beer," he quipped. They began loading him into the ambulance. "Wait." They paused. He looked directly at Natasha, struggling to keep conscious now. "The files you released... there has to be some on Bucky. He's out there now and I... I need to find him."

"I can do better than those," Natasha promised. She owed him a lot at the moment, and she had information that she could give him. She had a responsibility to, right? She turned back to Fury and the others. "Do you think you can handle the aftermath of this without me," she asked. "I need to make a trip to Kiev."

"I got this," Nick replied, already punching in some numbers on his phone. "Do what you gotta do."

"Good," Natasha said, already headed out. "Don't get me arrested when I come back."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author contributions: A Velvet Rose and SarahCon


	4. Shadow

Natasha was sitting in the waiting area of Ronald Reagan airport in DC. They had just cleared all flights to take off and they were just about to let first class passengers board. Natalie Rushman happened to be a very frequent flyer here, so she figured that she should at least get first class. She had a flight directly to Kiev, and from there it would be about a thirty minute drive to the meeting point at an old Red Room safe house. She called in some favors, and the files would be waiting there. She glanced up at the television that was playing and watched the news report that was going on.

_ "There has been no statement from Captain Rogers or anyone from SHIELD as of yet," the reporter said. "With all of Shield's files out on the internet however, the CIA and Interpol have been collaborating on what to do with this. There is one person in the main spearhead of reports that the CIA want arrested and questioned. This woman, Natalia Romanova, or Natasha Romanoff. She is credited with numerous assassinations for the KGB before being brought to Shield, as well as numerous other crimes, but most noticeably, the kidnapping of Ho Yinsen more commonly known as the person that saved Tony Stark when he first became Iron Man. There has been no comment from Tony Stark or Stark Industries, but we can expect that they will back the CIA in the search for Romanoff's arrest." _

_ Well shit,  _ Natasha thought as boarding was called for First-Class passengers she got up to board the plane. This just got a whole lot more difficult. She might just have to go on the run after she got the files back to Rogers. There was no way Stark would let her in the tower now, and Rogers would probably just look at her in disgust.

There would be time to ponder that later and she showed her boarding pass and walked into the terminal that led to the plane.

**_Kiev, Ukraine_ ** **_  
_ ** **_September 5th, 2013_ **

After Natasha arrived in Kiev, she took a taxi to a small storage unit place in the middle of a suburban neighborhood. It was a small storage facility, nondescript and something that no one would glance at again. Mainly held units for families that needed just a little bit of extra space. She went to her unit and casually opened it up. Inside was only one thing, a pitch black Ducati Superleggera. Most people would be surprised with how much money she actually had. With her SHIELD salary and the jobs she did on the side, her web was pretty extensive and held a lot of money. There were also investments she made, and various safe houses and storage facilities all over the world that she had to keep up. Hell, most of this money wasn’t taxed, but she wasn’t about to let the government know about that part. Most jobs were under the table to begin with.

She zipped up her black leather jacket and slung her back pack over her back. She climbed on the motorcycle and placed the helmet on her head. It was a flat black helmet with a red hourglass on the back of it. It was a gift from Clint in all his humor. Normally she would refuse it, but he was sneaky and had his kids give it to her. That and she also kinda liked it. She started the cycle and took off out of the storage unit, not bothering to close it because she knew she would have to ride to Odessa after and she could store her bike there. Her payments would stop at this facility and they would take it over, but there was nothing left in there to claim.

The drive was decently silent the entire way. It was about 4am, and there were only a few trucks on the road at this time that she had to pass. It gave her a lot of time to think over the past couple of days and how her life had changed forever. She was a criminal, she had worked for the KGB for decades, and the American people wouldn’t allow her to stay. She was pretty sure she could go to one of her safe houses in France or Germany, maybe contact Fury and get some jobs to keep herself busy. She could still visit the Bartons occasionally, but she couldn’t stay forever. She might be hunted after all of this.

Maybe the Avengers would help her. Steve was a good man, she knew Terra looked up to her. But what about when they found all of this information? It was something completely different to work with someone for a mission when you needed them, and associate with a known assassin that had a lot of blood on her hands and vouch for them. Especially with the Yinsen situation, loyalty to the rest of the Avengers group was probably more prevalent than a random lady they had just met, and Stark already knew of her when she vetted him for the Avengers Initiative. To say he wasn’t happy with her to begin with might be an understatement.

Natasha focused up as she arrived at the drop off point for the files. She stopped the bike and took off her helmet. It had been some time since she had seen this cabin. At least 20 years or so. She had stayed here while on mission in the city for the Red Room. It didn’t end up pretty for her target, but it was a success for her. She walked to the small building, pistol out and ready to fire. She knew her contact wouldn't be here, but with the things that she just exposed to the world, you could never be too sure. She entered the building, and true to their word, there was a manila folder on a table. Natasha didn't waste anytime grabbing the folder and walking back out. She walked over to her bike and before putting it in her backpack, opened the folder. There on the first page was the Winter Soldier in cryosleep, and in the bottom left was James Barnes. She shut the folder and slipped it in her pack. It wasn't her place to read it, and she already knew most of the information inside. The one thing she was sure of, however, is that it was going to be a tough read for Rogers. She revved the engine and took off, not sparing another second there.

**_Odessa_ **

Natasha knew the drive from Kiev to Odessa wasn’t that long of a drive, but she needed to take a bit longer to make sure that she wasn’t being tailed. She got some food and took care of some affairs in Kiev before making the drive and even then, didn’t even go to her storage unit in the city until about 1am. She had a flight back to the United States in about four hours. Red eye, little amount of people. She zipped up her jacket and closed the unit door after parking and securing her bike and helmet, starting the walk to where she could get a cab to take her to the airport. She was walking along the units when she felt something off, like she was being watched. She kept a brisk pace but started to lighten her steps every other one. She heard them, faint steps of someone that was clearly following her. She carefully unzipped her jacket and reached inside to grab the handle of her Glock.

_ Three..... _

_ Two...... _

_ One..... _

Natasha turned and fired three quick shots. A raven-haired woman quickly dodged the gun that was pointed at her and grabbed onto Natasha's arm, slapping the gun away. Natasha followed with a quick punch to the head. The woman stumbled back and Natasha got her first look at her. She was young, obviously Russian by facial and bone structure. She wore a catsuit just like Natasha did, more fresh than any of Natasha’s uniforms, practically new. The really terrifying part was the red hourglass logo that was on her belt. The symbol of the Black Widow.

Natasha didn't have long to look as the woman came flying back at her. She slapped away a kick that was aimed for her head, and tried to sweep out the legs of her opponent. The woman flipped over her attack easily and punched her in the back of the head. Natasha took the hit and rolled forward, turning to face the woman again. While she rolled the woman had pulled a knife and threw it at her. Natasha ducked her head back, but she only prevented it from embedding itself in her forehead. It grazed her, drawing a nice line on her forehead and cutting a little bit of her hair. She grunted at the slight pain and rolled to her right, grabbing her fallen gun.

She jumped up and pointed the gun at the woman, who simply raised her hands, a smirk on her face.

"Who are you," Natasha demanded.

"You don’t remember Natalia," she asked. “I’m insulted. Though you never did include me in any of your training. Always shunning me to the corner, as if my mother didn’t do that enough.”

It clicked then for Natasha as she got a really good look at the woman. It had been years since she’d seen her, and even then she was just a child.

“Anya?” Natasha asked, the name of her Headmistress’s daughter while Natasha was in the Red Room. She was more known as Recluse because the Headmistress would always keep her away from the others and never let her train.

“Very good Natalia,” Anya said, a smirk on her face now.

"That's the mark of the Black Widow," Natasha said, gesturing to her belt. "It's not possible. I made sure of it."

"When you wiped out the Red Room," Anya said. "Do you really think the Headmistress is that vulnerable? That she would let her legacy be destroyed so easily."

"The Soviets have fallen," Natasha said. "The KGB is in ashes. The Red Room has to be gone, there is no one to support it."

"Except there is," Anya said, with a smirk.

Natasha's eyes widened as she put the pieces together.

"Hydra," she breathed.

"There’s the intelligence I remember," Anya said. "The Red Room and Hydra have been working together for a while now. How do you think your precious Winter Soldier was a pawn for them."

"Why now," Natasha said. "Hydra is exposed. Everyone knows of its existence."

"And you released the files," Anya said. "So, as the true Black Widow, my mission is to remove you. By any means necessary."

"So why haven't you," Natasha asked.

"The ultimate mission for Hydra is to rid the world of everything that could compromise what it needs to accomplish," Anya said. "Right now, as we have found out, the Avengers are on the top of that list."

"I'm not an Avenger," Natasha said.

"But we can start knocking out two birds with one stone," Anya said. "Emphasis of birds."

Natasha's stomach dropped as the pieces lined up and she looked into Anya's eyes.

"Hawkeye," Natasha almost whispered.

"Agent Barton is quite comfortable right now," Anya said. "But I can promise you that it won't be for long."

"Why come here just to tell me this," Natasha demanded. "Why not just kill me and him and be done with it."

"Oh Natalia," Anya said. "There is more than one way of killing someone. I like the chase anyway, and now you know where to start."

Anya, as quick as Natasha could, dropped a smoke grenade down that covered her hasty retreat. Natasha fought through the smoke to try and find her, but Anya was already gone.

_ Shit,  _ Natasha thought as she holstered her weapon and picked up her bag. Clint was captured, and she had no idea where he was, only the numerous Red Room locations that there were. Well, heading back to Avengers tower didn't look like an option now. She had to find Barton, fighting the Red Room and Hydra.

_ Shit _

**_New Jersey_ ** **_  
_ ** **_September 12th, 2013_ **

Natasha was sitting in a diner somewhere in New Jersey. She had gotten an encrypted text from Fury designated the meeting space and time. She didn't have long though, she knew she had to get to Clint as fast as possible. In front of her laid a map of the world and red X's where the possible Red Room bases where Clint could be being held at. She didn't even know if they would keep him in a Red Room base, now that Hydra was in the mix. In her backpack on her right was the file about the Winter Soldier. It was priority one for Natasha, then get to Clint.

Natasha looked up at the news conference that was being held and saw Terra talking back to a bunch of senators and generals. She set aside the map for now and focused on the small meal in front of her.

_ "Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?" _

_ "I do,” Terra responded. _

_ Terra took her seat, her hands folded on the table in front of her. The crowd was quiet except for the occasional click of a camera and the sound of scratching pencils from the press. The committee general cleared his throat and looked at her, "Why haven't we yet heard from Captain Rogers?" He demanded. _

_ She crossed her arms. "He will make a statement to the public shortly. Though, I think the giant ships in the Potomac make his position quite clear." _

_ The general's thick brows furrowed as he leaned forward. "Well, he could explain how this country's expected to maintain its national security now that he and you have laid waste our intelligence apparatus." _

_ Terra leaned forward too. "Hydra was selling you lies, not intelligence." _

_ "Many of which you seem to have had a personal hand in telling." Murmuring circled the room and Terra swallowed, her own guilt of unknowingly being involved with Hydra surfacing. She couldn't defend herself at that statement. _

_ "Agent," General Scudder spoke up. "You should know that there are some on this committee who feel, given your service record and your past as a civilian, that you belong in a penitentiary, not mouthing off on Capitol Hill." _

_ Terra's fingernails dug into the aluminum covering the wound on her arm. She relaxed her hands and uncrossed her arms, playing a pleasant smile on her face. "Gentlemen, let me make something very clear to you. You're not gonna put me in a prison. In fact, you're not gonna put any of us in a prison." She raised a brow. "Would you like to know why?" _

_ Scudder looked exasperated at this point. "Do enlighten us," he said in a tight voice. _

_ "Because you need us. Desperately," she added. She glanced at the recording cameras live-streaming this and looked back at the generals. "Yeah, the world is vulnerable and we help make it that way, but we are also the best qualified to defend it. So, please, by all means," Terra stood up, straightening her blazer with a playful smile. _

_ "Arrest me, Generals. But you'll be wasting a lot of time filling out the paperwork to get me out of prison when you need me again." _

_ She gave a short wave with her hand. "Ciao, gentlemen." Terra turned on her heel and walked through the press, shooting finger guns for pictures before she walked out the doors. _

She chuckled at the last line and took a drink of her coffee.

"I would have said it differently," she said to herself. "Same jist, less flare. Maybe a little more sarcasm."

Natasha was about to leave when the news cut again to none other than Steve Rogers, seemingly on the steps of the courthouse where Terra was inside of. Natasha paused and then sat back down, wanting to hear what he had to say. He did look a little nervous, but in all of her time, she never knew Captain America to back down like that.

_ With a deep breath, Steve leaned forward. Everyone fell to a hush. He opened his mouth. "I stand before you today as Steve Rogers, not Captain America, not an Agent of Shield, not even as an Avenger. I remain an Avenger despite what happened. You guys are probably wondering what did happen. It's a long story. Back during World War Two, there existed a Nazi subdivision called Hydra. Hydra was run by a man named Johann Schmidt, who sought power from a mythical object many believed didn't exist. But he found it and he used it to create weapons - weapons that could disintegrate soldiers in the blink of an eye. Weapons that could make them implode on the spot with barely a trace. Weapons that were given out to Nazi troops and used against us. I knew a lot of good men who died at the hands of those weapons. Because of Hydra. _

_ "All throughout the war, the Strategic Scientific Reserve worked to stop them, to meet them at every turn and prevent them from reaching their goal: world domination. I helped. I led a team, the Howling Commandos, to carry out the most dangerous missions. It took a while, but we stopped them. I confronted Schmidt on a plane that was going to drop a bomb on New York. In the ensuing scuffle, the mythical object was lost at sea and so was I. You know this story.” _

_ "What you don't know is that the SSR, the precursor to SHIELD, found that object and kept it hidden from the public. No one knew they had it and that they were using it as a power source. Experimenting on it. They've kept it all these years and the public never knew. Why? Because Hydra didn't die with Schmidt like you- like I- like we had thought. Schmidt's second-in-command, Dr. Arnim Zola, struck a deal with the SSR to cooperate in exchange for conditional freedom from prison. He was the first and biggest seed of Hydra that would grow within SHIELD and spread like a virus over the years. Hydra became SHIELD's shadow, existing just under the surface all these years. _

_ "On a recent mission for SHIELD, Terra Montgomery and I got suspicious. We did some investigating, went on the run because of it, were targeted because we got too close, we were almost executed for it. But we escaped and we learned of their plans. Hydra was going to use government funding to create helicarriers that would eliminate threats before they happened. It was preemptively punishing and I would not stand for it. I did not and do not want people to live in fear. We are a country of freedom and liberty and I will do my best to keep it that way." _

_ He paused for the roaring applause and hoots and hollers. It appeared that not everyone in the crowd was a journalist and that not every journalist was afraid to let their opinion on this matter be known. When it calmed down, he continued. "With the help of Terra Montgomery, Natasha Romanoff, and my allies, we destroyed the helicarriers before they could fire, killing millions of people who had yet to do what Hydra predicted they would. That was the battle you all saw and I apologize for any property damage. I'm sure Stark can pay for... at least some of it." _

_ There were a few chuckles at his lame attempt at a joke. _

_ "In order to stop the plan from going through, we had to assume that everyone aboard those ships was Hydra. There was no efficient way to tell who was telling the truth. It could've been anyone - and it was. So we tore them all down. There were casualties. Loyal SHIELD agents and Hydra agents alike. I've been told there were no citizen deaths, for which I thank God every day. And now here we are. I'll take your questions now." _

_ Immediately, all of the reporters surged forward a few inches, thrusting their devices at him. "Captain! What happens to SHIELD now that Hydra's been revealed?" _

_ "SHIELD's been dismantled," Steve replied. "Director Fury was shot and killed by a Hydra agent and there's no safe way of building it back up again. SHIELD sacrificed itself to get rid of Hydra." _

_ "And did they succeed?" came the follow up. _

_ Steve hesitated. "No. A few escaped. SHIELD had branches all over the world, so Hydra did too. But just as not all Hydra personnel were killed, not all SHIELD agents were either. And even though SHIELD is no more, we will still fight for good. I know several agents here have applied to the CIA, some to Stark Industries, some to politics and other government positions. We as a people still exist and we still fight." _

_ "Could you be more specific about how you plan to take down the remaining Hydra agents?" another reporter asked. _

_ "Some of my Avengers teammates and I will head a team to track down one of their most powerful assets. He's in the wind at the moment, but as soon as we pick up his trail, we'll be led straight to many Hydra bases, I'm sure. And then we'll bring them down." _

_ "Captain! Where were the other Avengers during this whole debacle?" _

_ "Otherwise occupied. And our mission was relatively low key. Technology was being monitored. We couldn't safely call for back-up without alerting Hydra to the request so we kept them out of the loop." _

_ "Do you think things would have gone better had you had Iron Man or the Hulk on your team?" _

_ Steve's cheek twitched almost imperceptibly. "Maybe. But there's no use dwelling on what might have been." _

_ "What happened to that power source Hydra was experimenting on?" _

_ "That power source was the Tesseract, which was sent back to Asgard with Thor after the alien invasion." _

_ "How do we know you're not Hydra? Or any of your team?" _

_ Steve paused. He had not anticipated this question (he really should have). He couldn't help but be offended that after everything he did, they still doubted him. But really he couldn't blame them. After a while, he said: "You don't." _

_ A murmur broke out among the press, whispering to themselves about whether anything he just said was true and whether or not they could quote him now. _

_ Steve raised a hand for silence. "You don't," he said again. "You just have to trust me. I know you don't like it and I know it's not proof, but I'm asking you to please believe me when I tell you that I am not, nor will I ever be, an agent of Hydra. I fought them for years in the war. I watched as they slaughtered my friends and fellow soldiers. As they took the life of my best friend." His grip on the podium tightened enough that the leather of his gloves creaked. "They are Nazis. And I watched them commit horrors that I will never unsee and I refuse to ever let happen again. Never. I swear to you on my mother's grave that I will do everything in power to take Hydra down once and for all. Me and my team. And if you don't trust them, then you can hold me accountable. But you won't have to. No more questions." _

Natasha was impressed by the speech. It wasn’t lost on her that her name had gotten mentioned there as helping tear down Hydra, and it might be a saving grace for her in the long run. If anything it couldn’t hurt her situation more. Natasha slipped on her sunglasses and left some bills on the table, putting the map in her backpack with the file. She walked outside and got onto her black Ducati and slipped her helmet on, red hair hanging out the back. She clipped her backpack across her chest and put the dark visor down on the helmet. She revved up the engine and sped off towards DC, still having about a three hour drive in front of her.

**_Three hours later…….._ **

Natasha arrived at the cemetery and shut down the engine on her motorcycle. She put the kickstand down and took off her helmet, putting it on one of the handlebars. She glanced over to her right and saw the small gathering of people there, knowing Fury was going to try and get everyone he could. She shook her head in a smile as she grabbed the folder. She got there just as Fury was walking away, catching the last bit of the conversation. She didn't say anything to Fury. He knew her situation and she knew his. She didn't get this far in life without knowing a lot of other people's secrets. Shield was already rebuilding behind the scenes, out of the public, and Rogers' eye. Fury knew that if he really needed her for a mission, he knew where to contact her. Natasha was wearing her motorcycle jacket and dark jeans. Her hair wasn't too messy, but it wasn't the cleanest ever, and she had the appearance of a girl who wasn't staying around for coffee.

"You should be honored," Natasha called out, announcing her presence. "That's about as close as he gets to saying thank you."

Steve turned towards her and met her halfway. "You're not going with him?" he asked, at least trying to make small talk, which she had to smile at.

No," Natasha replied with a small smile on her face.

She had to track down Clint, and he could be anywhere. She didn't have any leads on his last whereabouts or any major Hydra cells still active. A few hours on a laptop could help with that. She also noticed Rogers practically inching to the file that she had in her hand. She respected that of him. Wanting only to find his friend more than anything else, even pursuing Hydra. That is something she hadn't seen a lot of.

She could practically hear Clint teasing her, saying she had a crush on Captain America and how, even the great Black Widow, could fall under the good Captain's spell. The real question she had to ask herself, was she falling under his spell? She respected the hell out of the man, his morals were in the right place and he was a great fighter. But she was surrounded by fighters, and here was a guy that only fought for someone else and not himself. And not to mention he was the peak of human perfection.

_ Stop it Natalia,  _ she cursed herself and refocused on the people in front of her.

"Is that...?" He gestured at the folder in her hands and Natasha nodded

"Yeah," Natasha said. "That thing you asked for. I called in a few favors out of Kiev."

Natasha held out the file to Steve.

"I have to tell you," Natasha said. "I knew James well. I can try and help you fill in some gaps. He was a big part of my initial training, and we worked together a lot. Spent a lot of time together. I don't have long though. You have your ghosts and I have mine, and mine are causing issues at the moment."

He took the file from her, but didn't open it. Instead, he looked at her, a bit confused. "You did?" She could tell he had numerous questions about that bit of information, but the second part of her statement distracted him as well. "Anything I can help with?" He asked.

"You probably don't want to get involved," Natasha said, adjusting the straps on her backpack. "An old enemy has been hiding in the shadows after I thought that I wiped out. They have received funding from a major Hydra branch, and they have Barton. I know they are keeping him at a Red Room base, but there are so many scattered across the world, that I would need at least two years to go through all of them unless I guess correctly. My guess is that it is near a big Hydra base, but they have managed to stay hidden longer than the Red Room."

Natasha started to turn, figuring that this was too messy for these people. It was going to get ugly, real ugly. But she made Laura a promise to keep Clint safe. And with little Natasha on the way, she couldn't break that promise now. Her hand went to the silver arrow necklace that hung around her neck. Clint had gotten it for her on the one year anniversary of joining Shield, or as he put it, the one year anniversary of him deciding not to put an arrow through her skull. Like he would ever be able to anyway. Clint meant a lot to her, and it was necessary to find him as soon as possible.

"I don't suppose you had any recent contact with him," Natasha asked, figuring any clue would be helpful.

"I haven't heard from him since the Chitauri invasion," he replied honestly. "But if Hydra's got him, I want to help. They already destroyed the life of one of my friends. I won't let them do it again. And besides, that sounds like a big undertaking. Terra, Bruce, and I knew Clint. Not supremely well, but he's a good guy. We'll help you."

Bruce Banner, who Natasha had clocked immediately upon her arrival and his reputation interjected at that point, pretending not to eavesdrop earlier. "I know where a big Hydra base is. Terra found one while searching for one of Hydra's smaller leaders. He's got a base in... in Mexico City. She found it based on information from someone on the inside and there's no confirmation of this, but there may be ties to both the Red Room and A.I.M. It's as good a place to start as any and Terra and I were already headed there to take it down. We could all go. To be honest, we could use the help."

Sam and Terra walked over as well probably not being able to help but listen in either. "Who is Clint, exactly?" Sam murmured to Terra. "Another, uh,  _ former  _ special agent. Uses a bow and arrow," she replied and Sam didn't look surprised. "We'd be happy to help, but uh," Terra looked to Steve and crossed her arms. "What about Bucky?"

"Lemme take care of that," Sam spoke up, clapping a hand on Terra's uninjured shoulder. "I'll work on tracking him down while you guys kick some Hydra-ass. This sounds like an OG Avengers mission anyways."

Terra's brows furrowed and looked up at him worriedly. "Are you sure? You're a target now-"

"I'm sure," he insisted. "I know how to be evasive and I know a thing or two about finding some leads."

"Sam, you don't have to do that," Steve said even though it would be a big help. "You already dropped everything to help me once. I don't want you to give up your job or your reputation or your chances with the girl at the VA," he half-joked.

"I know I don't have to do it," Sam said. "But let's face it, she was out of my league anyways." Sam grinned. He looked to Terra. "Where should I start?"

Terra took out her phone and held her hand out for his. "I'll connect you to Jarvis to help you out when you need it." He gave her his phone and she punched the number in, tossing it back to him.

Natasha barely heard them though as her heart plummeted at the mention of Mexico City. Of course Anya would take Clint to the site of that facility. That could possibly be the source of the most pain in her life. She should have blown up that place when she had the chance, but it was too painful.

"He's there," Natasha managed. "I'll get him back to you."  _ And his family,  _ Natasha mentally added. She didn't include herself getting back. She knew she wouldn't be walking away from this one. Her journey would finally end, where she first established herself as the Black Widow.

Steve turned to Natasha then. "Yes, we will. We'll leave tonight. We'll rendezvous back at the Tower, catch a plane to Mexico City, and we'll execute a rescue mission." He almost smiled. "It's time to get the Avengers back together."

"Then I guess you guys have a plane to catch," Sam said. "I'll drop you off at the airport."

Terra bounced happily on her heels. "Hell  _ yes.  _ Getting the gang back together, leaving DC, gonna kick some  _ more  _ ass, it's like Christmas."

"Here." Steve said, holding out the folder with Bucky's files to Sam without looking at it. "As soon as you find him, you call me. And... here." He reached into his pocket, pulled out a pen, and scribbled a phone number directly onto the folder. "This is her number last I checked, but this is for Sharon Carter. She's- or she was a SHIELD agent and my neighbor. I heard about what she did during the battle and that she's looking for a job in the CIA. She'll help you if you need it. She's a good person."

There was some more conversation, but Natasha was still working her way through the Mexico City reveal. "I'll follow you guys there," Natasha said and she started walking towards her bike. She was almost out of sight when she remembered something. "And Steve," Natasha said. "With all that's gone on in James's life, be careful. Think things over real well, because You might not want to pull on this thread." Natasha continued off and walked towards her bike. When she reached it, she slipped on her helmet, and flipped down the dark visor. She revved the engine up and sped off towards the direction to where the car was parked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter contributors: A Velvet Rose & SarahCon. Reviews are always appreciated!


	5. Red

****

The ride to the airport was quiet for Natasha. Beside the fact that she was riding by herself, her mind was quiet. She knew what was going to happen, how her journey would probably end today. She was trying to make peace with it, but there was something in the pit of her stomach that was slowly rising. Natasha rolled up to the airport and turned off her bike. She leaned it over and kept it propped up with her foot. She took her helmet off and hung it on one of the handle bars. She glanced over to her right and saw Pepper Potts standing at the front door.

"This oughta be interesting," Natasha murmured, her mind still in other places.

The last time she saw Pepper, and well Pepper saw her, was when she was Natalie Rushman, evaluating Stark for the Avengers. She didn't say much to Pepper after she took off after Vanko from the Expo. In fact she had Shield sent her resignation in and didn't talk to Pepper to explain herself. What she did know is that Pepper was now one of the best CEOs in the entire world, and had a whole lot more confidence than she had back during the Expo. Which meant that Pepper could do whatever she wanted to her, throw lawsuits and sue her for all she had, and she wouldn't even have a case. Her assets were still resetting after the Shield takeover, and she had lost a good three million dollars from her web. She had her private accountant working on retrieving most of her money back, and she knew that Matt would help her in the courtroom, but it was still a fight she did not want to have.

She followed Steve, Terra and Bruce towards the plane, not saying goodbye to Sam due to the fact that they barely knew each other and made her way to the plane. Pepper said her hellos to the rest of the group and then turned to Natasha. Natasha could see Pepper trying to read her and she was almost afraid of what she was going to say next. As it turned out, she had nothing to worry about.

"Hello, Natasha. I was informed you were coming along, nice to see you again," she said, as professional as ever.

"It is nice to see you as well Miss Potts," Natasha said respectively. She didn't want to push anything, and she knew she had limited time anyway.

"We should start boarding now," Pepper said, heading off with Terra to the plane. They seemed like they were very good friends, and Natasha was glad that Pepper had someone at least. She figured Tony would be enough of a handful to need someone to vent to every once in a while.

Natasha waited for everyone else to board first, making sure her backpack was secure. She did have a couple of concealed weapons, a couple meaning about 7. Two guns, her widow bites, and a couple of knives. A girl could never be too sure, especially with Hydra running around. She knew she could get them through airport security, what kind of spy was she if she couldn't get past TSA agents. As they boarded the plane, Steve and Pepper had a conversation about stopping in New York for supplies, but Natasha felt like she wasn't needed in this.

Natasha just moved in silently and sat down in a seat that was facing a small table. Stark always had his fancy jets. She pulled out her laptop and opened it up, easily cracking the wifi. Natasha plugged some earbuds in and opened up the web browser, ready to do some serious research. Her home page popped up and it was just a popular news site, and boy was it busy. Pictures of the helicarriers and Rogers were everywhere. Videos of his and Terra's press conference were dotted around too, and for the most part, they were all singing Captain America's praises.

_Captain America Exposes Hydra, saves the world._

_Shield no more, Hydra Exposed thanks to Captain America._

Natasha smirked at the headlines that were there and was about to click off the page when an article in the bottom left caught her eye. She scrolled to it and read the headline.

_KGB Assassin, Natasha Romanoff, not being charged with anything._

Natasha opened the document and it led her to a video from Alex Jones. Natasha sighed as she saw the numerous comments agreeing with the man even before she watched the video. She looked up from her laptop to make sure that none of the other people were close to her at the moment, and clicked play on the video. It opened up with Alex Jones sitting on a chair in front of a screen with her face on it. Natasha knew this was trouble when he began to speak.

_"Now," he began. "I think we all owe Captain America and his team a giant thanks for what they did for this country. But let's talk about something that everyone is seeming to forget. The person that dumped all of the information on the web was a woman named Natasha Romanoff, or as she is called in the underworld, the Black Widow. Shield has had her in the background doing covert ops and staying out of the light for a decent amount of time, and for good measure. Natasha Romanoff is a criminal. Before, there might have not been enough information to convict this woman, but due to recent developments, Romanoff has handed all of this information to us. She is an ex-KGB spy, working against the United States for most of her life. She is credited with the murder of over 300 American citizens, and those are just confirmed kills. That doesn't count any US citizens that were not confirmed, or any international kills. She is also, get this, responsible for the capture of Ho Yinsen, the man that created and saved Tony Stark aka Iron Man. Now this Russian whore is just waltzing through our great country without having to answer for her crimes. I think we as an American people should demand that this woman be apprehended, convicted, and hanged for the horrible crimes she has committed against this country, and if I was Captain America or anyone from the Avengers, I would look into these files before you protect this scum of a woman. And if you are watching this Natasha Romanoff, the American people will not stand for this, and we will be coming for you."_

Natasha didn't even know she was holding her breath until the video was over. She looked to the analytics only to have her stomach drop even lower. 15,654,867 views already, and over 500,000 likes and less than 50 dislikes. Natasha just leaned back and played the video again, listening to every true word that this man was saying.

After playing the video again, she glanced up to see Steve waving at her, trying to get her attention. She quickly took her ear buds out and hit the back button on her page, sending her back to the main home screen. She didn't need Rogers seeing anything that would bother him at this point.

"Captain," Natasha said, lying fluently. "I'm sorry, just reading up on the latest news. The media loves you guys, almost makes me sick to read and here everything on the web now."

"Steve," he corrected, always being the gentleman. "And you don't have to apologize. I was just curious what you were reading. You seemed very engrossed in it." He leaned his chin on his palm and his elbow on the armrest to get a better look at both Natasha and her laptop. "What are they saying about us now?"

"All good things," Natasha said truthfully, not including herself in the 'us'. "Praising you and Montgomery, heroes of DC. The sentinels of Liberty. Sacrificing all to take down Hydra, no matter the cost. Your speech is on every news site on the planet. Approval rating is through the roof. It's like you're on those dreadful War Bond tours again."

Natasha smiled a little at that memory, the first time she saw a video of Captain America. They had showed it to the Red Room girls in her early days of training, figuring that Captain America would be a target for Russia in the future and not anticipating him going down in ice.

"The Star Spangled Man with a plan right?" Natasha said. "Surprised you didn't keep the triangle shield, I mean how do you know what to say without looking at your lines on the back of it."

Steve groaned and slid his hand up to cover his eyes. "Ugh, don't remind me." He leaned back in his chair, amusement bubbling inside him despite himself. "I've recited those damn lines so many times I could probably still do it. As for the triangle shield, it was only made of tin. It came in semi-handy that first time," he admitted thoughtfully, rubbing his chin as he looked back at his memories, the ones that weren't too traumatic. "But it got kind of destroyed after. And when I saw her later-" he patted the shield that stood next to his chair, "-I knew she was the one for me."

"Yeah well I owe a little of my life to that shield," Natasha said. "You saved my ass in Stalingrad when you were there in '44. That school you got civilians out of when the Germans had us pinned. So thanks for that I guess." She hadn't seen Rogers that day, but she heard all of the buzz after they were rescued. Captain America and his Howling Commandos had swooped in and saved the day, saving all of the children from the Nazis. She smiled internally at the memory, it being one of her fondest ones.

He blinked in surprise and sat up straight. Natasha knew he was trying to piece together how she was in that situation, and for good reason. Her age and serum were off the books, no access to anyone but four people at SHIELD. Fury, Coulson, Hill, and Barton were the only ones. "Uh, you're welcome," he managed, and Natasha could tell that he really didn't know what to say. "It was a team effort."

"Fury probably didn't tell you about that," Natasha said, shrugging. "Him and his compartmentalization and all. See the Russians also wanted a Captain America. As did Hydra and so on and so forth. There were many attempts across the world at trying to recreate you. James was one of them, you've seen his strength and speed, and well I'm another attempt. Enhanced speed, strength, regeneration. Not as good as yours, think of it as a light beer to a regular."

Natasha knew that she needed to get some trust out of Steve. Not for longevity or any purpose for herself, but so he would know that any information she gave him about the Winter Soldier would be legit. So he could actually find some stuff out about who James Buchannan Barnes was.

"Natalia Romanova," she said with a little shrug and smile. "Born 1929 Volograd, Russia."

Natasha could see him try and process all of the information. She could see a little anger about the repeated attempts to recreate him, something that wasn't shared with him, so rightfully so. Also, the fact that he was talking to someone that had some shared life experience with him, and was roughly the same age. He had about ten years on her, but that was neither here nor there.

"Steve Rogers. Born 1918 Brooklyn, New York," he said, figuring it was only appropriate. "It's nice to meet you officially uh, Natasha."

"Natasha is fine," Natasha said, sensing his uncertainty of what to call her. It was actually kind of sweet. Not wanting to assume anything or be rude. She could read people really well, and she could also tell the questions that were nagging him. "So," Natasha said. "What do you want to know about James Barnes?"

He looked away, suddenly tense. He tried to hide it, but he was crap at it. "I..." but Natasha could tell he didn't know where to start. He probably wanted to know everything. He hadn't even gotten a good look at the folder before he'd given it to Sam, but that didn't really compare to real life experience, and Natasha had plenty of that. Steve took a deep breath. "When did you first meet him?"

"September 23, 1957," Natasha said, remembering the day well. "He oversaw the last part of my training. It was brutal, harder than anything I've ever gone through before. It hardened me, allowed the serum to really flow through my body. He cracked my femur that day with his metal arm."

He blinked again. "I may need a bit more explanation than that," he confessed. "Why was he overseeing it? What was his exact role? And why did he break your femur? If- if you don't mind my asking."

Natasha had never talked this much about her past with anyone other than Clint and Laura before. It was information that no one really needed to know, and that she was comfortable with sharing. But she could tell that Steve wasn't so much interested in her past but in James'.

"The Russian Army picked up James when he fell off the train," Natasha said, racking her brain for the information. "After attaching his metal arm, they cryofroze him until the war was over and you were in the ice. He would be woken periodically to train and carry out kill missions. His memory would be wiped periodically to keep him loyal to the Soviet Union. After I graduated from the Red Room and became the Black Widow, we became partners if you will, but he trained me until I was up to his standards. He broke my femur in a spar. I left an opening and for the Red Room, that usually meant something broken."

Steve swallowed thickly, and Natasha could see the guilt building up. "Did he...? Were there any.. signs that he was... that he remembered...?" He was trying to keep composure, and Natasha admired the hell out of that. "Was he like he is now? Blank? No personality or emotions?"

Natasha saw the absolute sorrow on Steve's face. She knew what that was like. To have her past and integrity questioned by something that wasn't in her control. "Hey," Natasha said, pushing her laptop aside and placing a hand over his. "None of this is your fault Steve. You hear me? None of it. Here." Natasha reached into her backpack and pulled out a bottle of vintage Russian vodka. She snatched two glasses and poured a hefty amount of the liquor in each glass. "I know you can't get drunk," Natasha said, putting the top back on the bottle. "I know the pain. But when I drink enough of this stuff, it dulls the senses a bit. Russian liquor will do that for you."

He looked down at the hand she'd placed over his, and Natasha knew that it would take more than her words to convince Steve that it wasn't her fault. The best she could do was help him through it. "Thanks," he said, accepting the glass. "Alcohol never quite did the trick after the serum, but old habits die hard, you know?" He tried to smile, but Natasha could tell that it didn't quite reach his eyes.

Natasha looked at him, for real this time. She had a way of reading people that she didn't do often. It was intimate, and almost as she was staring into his soul and picking him apart. She usually did this with marks, men or women she needed to seduce to gain information. But this, this was different. All she saw was a man that wanted to fight for others, and blamed himself for what went wrong.

"James will come back," Natasha said. "He didn't give up easily when I knew him, real pain in the ass sometimes, but always came back after a mission. He just may need some space, time to try and figure out who he actually is now. I know it took me some time after Clint brought me to Shield, and you probably needed some too after they fished you out of the ice."

Natasha picked up her glass and downed the entire thing, putting her burdens aside for Steve now. She grabbed the bottle and uncapped the top, filling the glass again.

"I know it's hard to believe and that you don't right now, but in this job that we do, the crazy death defying stuff that we take on, is to protect people," Natasha continued. "It took me a while to see it, but in all that you've done, you try to save as many people as you can. Sometimes, that doesn't get to be everyone. But, knowing James the way I knew him, a man of that integrity would make that sacrifice over and over again to accomplish the goal that you set out to do. It fucking hurts right now, and there is a part of it that always will hurt. But the night is darkest just before the dawn. He'll come back, when he's ready he'll come back to you."

Natasha topped Steve off and grabbed her glass and stood up. She walked over to the other side of the table, threw caution into the wind, and kissed Steve on the cheek. It wasn't much, just to let him know that she would be there. That she knew what he was going through and that James was a crucial part of her life too. She walked to the back of the jet where the bathrooms were to freshen up before the slog that was about to come.

**Manhattan, New York  
Avengers Tower**

When they landed in New York, Steve ordered the team to suit up and grab their gear. They were leaving again in fifteen minutes for Mexico City. Pepper led Terra and Natasha to Terra's old room when she stayed previously. "Tony knew your weapons of choice and, well, you know him," Pepper said to Terra with a hint of adoration as she walked over to press her hand against the wall to open a hidden cabinet. Terra gasped at all the new _toys._

There was a new suit, a different design from her old one. It was the catsuit but it was cut as a dark grey latex t-shirt with a zipper down the middle and black mesh sleeves. The suit had hard protective black pads on the shoulders, elbows and knees. There was an A insignia on the right arm, for Avengers. Her lower face mask was the same, except navy blue, as was her belt. Terra took down the metal bo staff of the rack to examine it.

"Uh yes, I know Tony made some modifications to the staff," Pepper said slowly and looked at her apologetically. "I have no idea what they are though."

"Guess I'll just have to fiddle and find out," Terra chuckled, whipping it down so it extended. Good to know some things were the same.

Pepper left her with a hug and made her promise to be safe before leading Natasha to a workshop with racks of general guns and weaponry Tony had. "He may have a prototype for Terra's suit since he had to specially make it to adjust to her mutation," she said. "And you guys should be around the same size, though Terra is a bit shorter, aha!" She pulled it out from a cabinet. It was like the one Terra had but darker and no mesh sleeves, just regular black long-sleeved. "I hope this will be okay?"

Natasha eyed the suit that Pepper offered her and looked at the 'A' on the shoulder. "I have my suit from DC," Natasha said, pointing to her backpack. She didn't feel like she had earned the Avenger title yet, or even deserved it in the first place. "I'll take some ammo though."

Pepper nodded and left the room so Natasha could change and gear up. Natasha slipped into her catsuit, and pulled out her belt. She paused before clipping it on, and looked at the red hourglass on the front of it. She took a deep breath and clipped it on, grabbing some extra Glock magazines and placing them in her belt. She holstered her two guns and took out her gauntlets. She was short on a couple widow bites, and she didn't have any spares, so that would have to do. She put them on and activated them to see that the tasers still worked in them. Her garrote was still intact, so that completed her checkup on her weapons. She did grab a combat knife that Stark had on the wall and placed it in a sheath on her calf.

She was about to walk towards the elevator when she looked in the mirror. Her hair was turning into her brighter shade of red it usually was. She had dyed it darker to keep her less suspicious, but she was headed towards a Red Room Installation, where she would probably end up dying. She took a deep breath and took out the combat knife and started cutting her hair to chin length. If she was going out, then she was going out herself.

Fifteen minutes later Natasha walked on to the helipad, seeing Terra there already and surveyed the New York skyline from the top of Stark tower, or the Avengers tower now, she guessed. Her hair blew in the wind as she gazed out and tried to imagine what it would have been like if she was here during the Chitauri incident.

Once everyone was there, Steve took command again. There were a couple of other faces that Natasha recognized from various reports, but she wasn't focused on learning them at the moment. "Alright everyone, if you're ready to leave, let's board the jet. If not, be back here as soon as you can. The longer we wait, the longer Clint's in captivity. Romanoff, can you fly?"

"Yeah, I can fly," Natasha said, heading towards the jet and walking inside. She climbed into the cockpit, sat down and started prepping the jet to go, slipping on a pair of earphones with a mouthpiece to communicate with. Once everyone was settled, Natasha lifted the jet off the ground and sent it skyrocketing into the sky. She pushed the speed on the jet, wanting nothing to get this over with as soon as possible. "We'll be in Mexico City in two hours," Natasha announced. "Sooner if I can."

"Alright, Archer, Stanton. What are we walking into?" She heard Steve say from the back. So she figured out the names of the people that were traveling with them, filed them away in case she needed them. They were probably focused on the Hydra base that was in Mexico City. Information she probably wouldn't need, since the Red Room base wouldn't be there, but she would still listen in, just in case.

"Their base is essentially a massive warehouse. I was able to infiltrate through the roof and sneak through their weapon storage. But we have to tread lightly since they have agents everywhere, every hour of the day," Jenny Archer explained, glancing at Axel Stanton before asking, "What else can you tell us about your father?" The teen was quiet for a moment before he decided where to start.

"He's ruthless, but I suppose that's a given. He grows bored of torture quickly so I'm sure he would have killed Jenny shortly after the time of her escape," he began. "My brother, Lucas, has been training for years, so you're going to want to restrain him immediately if you have to face him. If you can't manage that, you'll have to kill him. Chances are he's been trained to have just as little humanity as my father so I can't promise he'll be easy to capture. Our first goal has to be rescuing your friend because as soon as he finds out you've infiltrated, he won't hesitate to have him killed. I have no clue what kind of defense they have him under, but it's definitely going to be intense. Whatever you do, don't hesitate to kill anyone. They're all brought into my father's branch because of their lack of humanity, and they certainly won't hesitate to kill you first if they have the chance."

"Are there any special mutations we should know about? Anything that will give us a significant leg up on us?" Archer asked.

"As far as I know, both him and my brother are all human. My abilities were simply the result of being his human experiment," Stanton said. "But my brother began training with firearms as soon as my father brought him into business so we have to assume that he's been continuing that training ever since he was a kid. It's a safe bet that he's their best weapons expert so don't underestimate him."

"Anything else you can tell us? Anything at all?" Jenny asked.

"That's all I can think of for now, but if anything comes to mind I'll be sure to tell you," Stanton assured her.

"We'll capture if we can and only kill if we have to," Steve chimed in at that point. "Our priority is getting Barton out of there, but if we can bring this base down around them, we do it."

"Should we call the police?" Bruce suggested. "They could make good back-up."

"Afterwards," Steve answered. "We don't want them getting hurt or breaking our cover. Axel, I'm going to ask you to sit this one out. You're too close to the situation and, to be frank, we could be walking into a trap. I want you to stay in the jet with Bruce until it's all over."

"Uh, is that such a great idea, Cap?" Bruce asked. "I mean, if I go green then..."

"Then that means we'll need you both. I have faith in you, Bruce," Steve responded immediately, putting his faith in Banner.

"So, the strategy will have to be attack and stash as we go along, won't it? No guns," Terra jumped in at this point. "They are bound to have security cameras." Terra looked to Jenny. "Do you think you could hack into their surveillance and make the cameras loop?" She asked curiously.

"Barton won't be in that base," Natasha said, jumping in here to make sure they knew where the goals were. "That's where the main Hydra figurehead will be. You guys can focus on that and I'll get Barton back for you."

She could hear the focus turn to her and Steve was the first to speak up. "If he won't be there, then where will he be?"

"While I was retrieving the files on James you asked for, I was met by another Black Widow," Natasha said. "Recluse is what she goes by, Anya is her name. She tipped me off about Barton, which means the Red Room is in play."

Natasha's eyes glazed over as she began telling the tale.

"There is a facility just outside of Mexico City called _Smertel'naya igra,"_ Natasha said. "Or Death Game. It was active during the Cold War. Red Room trainees were sent there to train against Americans. Mexico City was close enough that American citizens were kidnapped and taken across the border, but didn't waste a lot of money on transporting the troops. The facility itself is an underground labyrinth. No light and only one exit. The prisoners would be released there, sometimes with weapons, and sometimes without. Then Red Room trainees were sent in. The game was simple, kill or be killed. One initiate would go in at a time. She was given 24 hours to complete the task, after then, a new game began and she was considered dead. If the prisoners survived one game, they would be inserted in the next game till they were dead. They even kept score outside the complex where everyone would wait for results."

Natasha took a deep breath as the memories washed over her. Her name on top of everything, the blood that was shed.

"There is a large opening at the very bottom of the facility," Natasha said. "That's where Anya will take him. I'll get him out, one person will just have to stay at the door to help him."

There was a very long pause from the jet as the information was taken in. It wasn't pretty at all, Natasha knew that, and was going to take a bit to process. Steve seemed to work through it first, coming up with a plan. "Alright, we'll split into two teams. Natasha and I will go after Clint in the Red Room facility. Terra and Jenny will infiltrate Hydra's base. We don't want Anya killing Barton prematurely, so you guys will have to be discreet in your take-down of Stanton until we give you the signal. If Jenny could scramble the cameras and their security system or even mess with the Death Game thing, do it. Once we have Barton, we can bring the whole thing down. I'll deliver Clint to Bruce for medical attention and then Natasha and I will rendezvous with the two of you inside the base. Everybody clear?"

Everyone answered in the affirmative but "No," was all that could be heard from Natasha. "I'm not taking Captain America into that hell hole. I'll get Barton out, but you won't be able to navigate the labyrinth. That's what they want, for you to follow and get lost and eventually die. I can navigate the tunnels, I've been through them enough."

"I'm sure Steve can handle it as long as he sticks with you," Terra brought up, brows furrowed. "It's definitely not a good idea to go in alone, Natasha. Barton will most likely be injured and need help getting out, that'll leave you vulnerable to attack when you're helping him on your way out. You need Steve there to cover you."

"It's non negotiable," Natasha stated. "That place isn't for people like you guys." _It's for scum like the Red Room and myself_ she mentally added, changing course a few degrees and pushing the speed even further.

There was no response to her statement there, and they went back to talking about the mission. Natasha didn't know if they were going to listen to her, but she wasn't focused on anything else now, but getting Barton out, killing Anya, and trying to survive the Death Game one last time.

**Mexico City Outskirts  
Death Game Red Room Training Facility**

After dropping off the members who would be attacking the main Hydra base, Natasha piloted the jet a few miles outside the city and to the location of the facility, like she could ever forget. She landed the jet down and looked out the window. The entrance to the game was simple. It was a metal door that opened to a flight of stairs that went down into the dark labyrinth below. Outside were the scoreboards and a few benches for the views to wait for the victors. She knew her name would still be on top of every single leaderboard, and she hoped that Steve couldn't read Russian, because he might just leave her to dry knowing her numbers.

"You ready?" Steve asked quietly. He had his gear and helmet on, just in case the fight did spill out or there was a trap set.

 **"** Yeah," Natasha said, and she walked down the ramp. "Stay here, Barton will be back soon."

It was almost like she teleported back in time as she made her way towards the entrance. She could picture the little girls waiting outside for their turn. The scoreboards didn't help either, all of them showing the terrible things that she had done. She approached the door and noticed that it was slightly ajar. Natasha took a deep breath and grabbed one of her guns and a knife, and Natasha entered the Death Game for the final time.

Natasha was almost transported back in time. She moved through the tunnels swiftly and expertly, stepping over bones and broken weapons. She was basically a zombie at this point, only focusing on the task at hand, and not around her. After a few minutes of walking she entered the large opening in the bottom of the labyrinth. At once, all guns pointed towards her. Natasha didn't flinch at them, and instead her eyes went straight to Clint and Anya in the center of the room.

"Natalia Romanova," Anya said, drawing a pistol. "Foolish girl, come to die."

"Anya," Natasha said. "Let Barton go, and you can kill me on spot."

"No I don't think so," Anya said, pacing around Hawkeye and running a hand across his face. "He will make an excellent trophy after I have your head. The other Avengers will come for him, and they will fall, just as you will."

Natasha just narrowed her gaze and prepared for her final fight. Almost at once, three Hydra thugs came charging at her. Natasha caught the first one's punch and jabbed him twice in the rib cage before pushing him off. That left her open to another attack, and she felt the pain of a knife slicing into her shoulder. She ducked low, sweeping the legs out from underneath the man and kicking up from the ground to jab the next man in the face twice. He went down hard and Natasha turned to see a fist flying at her face. It connected with her cheek and she stumbled back. The man that punched her cracked his knuckles and came charging at her. She quickly dodged another punch and jumped up on the man, using her legs to wrap around his neck and swing him around, breaking his neck in the process. As she was getting up, a gunshot rang out and Natasha was nailed in the calf by the man she had taken down earlier with a bloody nose.

 _Fine_ , Natasha though, grabbing her own pistol lightning fast and shooting the other two men on the spot.

"You are sloppy Natalia," Anya said, stalking forward now. The curious thing about all of this was that the rest of the numerous Hydra troops in the room didn't charge at her, only the three.

"This is what I have been waiting for," Anya said. "The chance to strike you down. To prove who the real Black Widow is. Once I have defeated you, your body will be displayed to show that Natalia Romanova, one of the liberators of Hydra in DC, has perished to a superior Black Widow."

Natasha grunted with the pain that she felt currently, but was overall ready for round 2.

Anya came at her, charging with a small war cry. Anya threw two quick punches to Natasha's head, which were blocked easily. What she didn't see coming was the roundhouse kick to her midsection that Anya delivered. Natasha doubled over as the wind was knocked out of her, and then was kicked again in the face by Anya, her nose breaking and sending blood streaming down her face. Natasha reeled back, landing on the ground.

"Pathetic," Anya said. "I expected more of a challenge. It looks like your age is catching up to you."

Natasha kicked up and charged at Anya, going on her offensive. Natasha threw punch and kick after punch and kick, and Anya almost looked bored blocking them all. As Natasha threw another punch, Anya caught it and spun around to land an elbow to Natasha's eye, making her see stars. Anya pivoted again and drew a knife, slashing it across Natasha's stomach.

Natasha yelped as she stumbled back, inspecting the wound. It was a shallow cut, drawing blood but leaving her insides, well inside. She could already feel her eye swelling as she dropped to one knee, spitting blood on the ground.

"You are a disgrace to the Black Widow name," Anya said. "I've seen children fight better than you. You are soft and weak. The Americans have turned you into something you're not. But there are a few things that the Americans got correct. That Captain America? He is a specimen isn't he. Perhaps when I am done with you, I may go and pay him a visit. A child with him could be most valuable to the Red Room."

At that point, something snapped inside of Natasha. She didn't know if it was her interest in Steve, the fact that Anya threatened a comrade in arms, or that she threatened someone else in general. Whatever it was, it gave Natasha her second wind, and this time, she was going to prove who the real Black Widow was. Natasha came like a fury at Anya, now landing most of her punches and kicks. Anya gave ground, and still the Hydra soldiers didn't come to her aid. She had made it very clear that she would deal with Romanoff without anyone else's help.

Natasha landed a solid punch to Anya's face, cutting her on the forehead with the ferocity of it. Anya growled, landing a kick to Natasha's midsection and then kneed her in the face, sending Natasha on her back. Anya was done playing now, and quickly jumped on Romanoff, straddling her waist and slamming the knife down towards Natasha's neck. Natasha brought her hands up just in time, halting the forward movement of the knife. It was now a battle of strength between the two Black Widows. Natasha's arms were shaky as the knife drew slower and slower towards her neck.

Images flashed in her mind then, Coulson picking her up after a mission, having lunch with Clint, visiting Cooper and Lila on the farm, seeing Laura pregnant, Steve smiling at her. This gave Natasha the last bit of strength she needed. With a yell she pushed back hard, slamming the butt of the knife into Anya's face. While Anya was reeling from the hit, Natasha grabbed the knife and turned it around and stabbed Anya through the neck.

The look on Anya's face was of pure shock as she started sputtering. Natasha was splattered with Anya's blood and she quickly pushed the dying woman off of her. Anya was now choking on her own blood, knife still well embedded in her neck. Natasha groaned as she somehow managed to stand up, holding her cut stomach as the rest of her injuries pained her. She looked down to see Anya finally stop moving, her eyes lifeless. She was the true Black Widow, and she was now the last of the Red Room. With this, there would forever be red in her ledger.

Natasha made her way over to Clint, moving pretty slowly. She untied him and he stood, looking at her with severe concern on his face. All around her, Hydra soldiers were raising their weapons at the two, getting through the shock that seeing their boss die right in front of them had. Natasha and Clint were hurt, Natasha probably worse off than Barton. None of them had any weapons, Natasha being out of ammo and Barton, well, a prisoner. "If you run you can probably get out of here," Natasha said."Go without me, make it back to Laura and the kids. I'll hold them off the best I can."

Then, without warning, the whizz of a red, white, and blue shield came out from nowhere. It rebounded off the wall and smacked a guard in the face. The others whirled their guns at him, but Steve was already upon them. He knocked two guns away from his direction and jumped, splitting his legs to kick two men in the jaw. They both tumbled backwards while Steve landed and swept the legs out from under another. "Go!" He yelled at Natasha and Clint, diving into a roll and picking up his shield on the way. He used it like a battering ram to shove another thug to the ground.

Natasha watched as Steve moved around the room like a mad man. Taking down troops left and right, and if she wasn't in too much pain, she would have complimented him. She started to leave when she noticed something in the rafters. A sniper, zeroing in on Captain America. She used the last bit of energy she had to sprint over to where Steve was, ignoring all of her injuries as she used all of her strength to shove him out of the way. The gunshot rang out and where Captain America just was, Natasha took his place.

Natasha didn't feel any pain with this shot. She stumbled back, looking down at her left breast and noticing a hole there where there shouldn't be. She gingerly went to touch it and her hand came back blood red. She started shuddering as her body was shutting down. She managed to look over at Steve, her eyes scared and mouth open, and then collapsed to her knees and fell down, her blood leaking on the floor around her.

"Natasha!" she heard, although it was faint and seemed like very far away. "Banner! Stand by for medical. Romanoff's down. Bullet through the chest." She was gathered up in strong arms and lifted off the ground. "Hawkeye! Can you run?"

"Yeah," Clint said. "Get going Cap, she doesn't have long."

She felt the beating of running feet as Steve sprinted out of the area. "Suppose this is a bad time to ask if you want to get dinner, huh Rogers," Natasha said weakly, figuring she didn't have a lot of time, so she could at least say she tried.

"Uh, yes!" she heard, though it was even further away this time. "Later!"

"Don't think I have later," Natasha said, sight now fluttering in and out. "Clocking out here. Barton knows where I want to be buried. Just... ask... hi.." Natasha lost consciousness at that point, head rolling back and eyes closing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter contributions by A Velvet Rose, SarahCon & Lesha Bee


	6. Wanted

Natasha woke with a start in a pristine white bed. Her hand immediately went to her chest, but found no hole there. She took off the covers and found herself in white pants and a white tank top. Not the suit she was wearing when she fought Anya, unlike any clothes that she had ever owned. She swung her legs out and placed her feet on the wood floor. She looked up and gasped at the view out on the balcony. The she realized where she was.

It was in a beautiful mountain house in Russia. There was no snow, no cold, nothing but a perfect view of the countryside in front of Natasha as she stood on the balcony looking out. And in that moment, she didn’t think about the battle or the Avengers. Not Anya, Steve, SHIELD, or the bullet that went into her heart. The only thing she was thinking about was how beautiful it was here.

"You've returned to me Natalia," a man's voice said beside her.

Natasha turned to see Alexi, her dead husband, standing in the bedroom. She had been forced to marry Alexi a little after her work with the Winter Soldier, and while she wasn't keen on it at first, it was vital to the Red Room. While at first she was hesitant, she soon grew to care for the man, and he her. Until the Red Room took him away from her to inject him with a serum that was more potent than the one her and Barnes were given. It was the Russian's final attempt at the original Erskine formula. But, it didn't produce yet again. The serum tore Alexi apart, killing him. Now he was here, right in front of her.

"Alexi," Natasha said, astonished. "How is this possible."

"I was waiting for you Natalia," he said. "Now that you've come to me, we can move on together."

At that moment, it seemed like the best plan in the world. She would be at peace, she had wiped out a lot of red. Finally put down the last remnants of the Red Room, helped the Avengers expose Hydra, and rescued Clint.

Clint. The thought of his name brought her back to reality. More images flashed through her mind. Fury, Coulson, Laura, Lila, Cooper, and Steve. Steve, the man that she had professed her feelings to as she was bleeding out in his arms. Did she have a chance? Did she deserve a chance? She wasn’t sure of either, but it was intoxicating and she needed to know. Natasha stopped and looked at him.

"I can't," Natasha said. "I want to, but also I don't. I'm not done yet, and great things are about to happen. You need to go on without me."

Alexi just nodded and the world seemed to distort around Natasha. Alexi disappeared as everything went black.

**Manhattan, New York  
** **September 19th, 2013**

Natasha felt herself come back into consciousness after that. There was still a dull pain in her chest, but she felt herself sitting in a bed. Since the last thing she remembered was being in Steve’s arms in Mexico City, she figured she wasn’t there anymore. Though she wasn’t sure where she was. She heard murmuring voices in the background and blinked her eyes open. She could see three people, Banner, Terra, and Steve in the room with her. That’s when she felt the weight on her hand. She looked over and Steve was holding it. She smiled to herself, maybe she had a chance after all.

They didn’t notice her wake, they were all pretty focused on Banner, who was looking over her chart. He had a frown on his face, which told her that it had been a tough recovery.  "Well, on paper, it doesn't look too good," she heard Banner say. "But in real life? I think we all know Natasha's gonna pull through."

Now was as good as time as any to make her presence known. "Of course I'm going to pull through," Natasha said weakly, her throat dry from the lack of fluids for a long time and her entire body aching. "Why make things easy?" She felt Steve’s grip tighten as she spoke and turn towards her. She smiled at him, and his surprised face. "Hey soldier," Natasha greeted. "Why so serious?"

Steve let out a relieved breath and smiled back at her. "No reason," he replied, giving her hand a very gentle squeeze. "Not anymore, anyway. How are you feeling?"

"Like I got hit by a train," Natasha said, trying her best to squeeze his hand back. "How long have I been out? And where am I?”

“You’ve been out a week in a coma,” Bruce said, filling in the gaps for her. “When you were hit, the bullet fractured into four pieces, a few lodging themselves in your heart. It was a rough surgery, you flatlined twice. But, you got through it. You’re here at Avengers tower now, recovering.”

Natasha took that all in and knew that the serum that she was injected with at the Red Room that sterilized her and enhanced her abilities and healing had saved her life. She would never escape the Red Room if she kept doing things like this. “What happened to the rest of the Red Room,” Natasha said. “And Hydra?” She coughed after that, her throat was just too dry. Steve got her a glass of water that was by her bedside and helped her take a drink of it.

"Long gone," Clint said, walking into the room and holding a bottle of vodka with a ribbon on it, the strong Russian kind, meant as a gift. "After you killed Anya and Steve wrecked shop with the other agents, we didn’t see any more presence of the Red Room. Then the rest of us took down the Hydra base as quick as possible while Bruce stabilized you. You bled all over Stark's jet by the way."

"He'll get over it," Natasha said, finishing up her drink and smiling a thanks at Steve.

"If you weren't so damn selfless he wouldn't have to worry about it," Clint said, setting the bottle on the side table and reached his hand to hold Natasha’s other hand, squeezing it in reassurance.

"Fuck you," Natasha said dryly, squeezing his arm as well. The two were close and showed their emotions in, some would say unorthodox, ways to each other. Clint knew Natasha was terrified when she got shot, and Natasha knew Clint was terrified when he thought she wouldn't wake up. This was their way of comforting each other.

"The doctor says you should be in recovery for about a month," Bruce said, making sure he did the good doctor thing. "Two weeks minimum."

"You'll be up and at 'em before you know it," Steve assured, smiling and leaning back in his chair. It was comforting to have him there, and she knew that he was trying to help her out and make her feel better. She wanted to get him alone and ask him about her question, but she wasn’t about to kick everyone out.

“She’ll break out way before then,” Clint said with a smirk, almost reading her thoughts and heading out. “Come on guys, let’s give these two some space.” Terra smiled as well, obviously sniffing it out as well. Bruce followed and soon she and Steve were alone. 

She turned to look at him, shifting a bit but not feeling a whole bunch of pain. She smiled at him and said the only thing that could come to her mind at this moment. “Hey.”

He smiled and scooted his chair closer to her bedside, leaning forward again so he could clasp her hand in both of his. "Hey," he parroted. "So... dinner plans may need to wait until you can at least move around," he said. "But until then, maybe we can have a night in? Order Chinese take-out and watch a movie or something."

So he said yes, he actually wanted to go out with her. She couldn’t help the smile that washed over her face and she saw it reflected in him. She was about to answer when she stopped and looked him in the eyes. She needed to say something to him, to warn him. "You know you don't have to do this," Natasha said. "All of that shit back there, that's just the tip of the iceberg on what has gone on in my life. There is dark stuff that still keeps me up at night. I don't want to tarnish your name by associating with me. I don't know if you ever looked, but a lot of people are still going after me because of what I did in DC. My file got put out there, and a lot of nasty things surfaced again. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if they came after me with an arrest warrant."

Natasha stopped and took a breath, collecting herself from her rambling. "What I'm trying to say is that I'm no good at this," Natasha said. "I haven't had a modern long term relationship ever. I don't show my emotions the best. There is a lot of dark stuff associated with me. And there is no way I am good enough for you. I completely understand if you don't want to do this. Who would want to go out with a monster anyway?”

"Natasha." Steve said, scooting his chair as close as it would possibly go and made sure to look her directly in the eyes. "You are not a monster. I have seen monsters. I have fought them. I have killed them. I have talked with them. And trust me when I say that you are not one. And if it's any consolation, I'm not good at this either. My one long-term relationship kind of... went down the drain. As for tarnishing my name, that would be quite a feat for someone who goes by 'Captain America'," he teased. "And there's dark stuff that keeps both of us awake. We can be there for each other." He raised her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. "I'm willing to try this if you are." 

Natasha got a wave of confidence at this point, and leaned forward to capture his lips with hers. She put as much passion as she could into it and felt him return it the same. It was like electricity between them, the whole cliche of fireworks going off. She held it for as long as her sore chest would let her and pulled back. There was a look of bliss between them as they settled back in.

"Okay," Natasha said with a smile. "But let's not tell anyone about it yet, I mean besides the people that already know. I know the uproar it was when Captain America was first seen with a date at that Gala after New York. And with my track record lately, we better wait till I'm at least tolerated in the media before we let them know."

“Whatever you want,” Steve said with a smile, still holding onto her hand. They stayed there in silence for a bit, just enjoying each other’s company. Natasha was actually dating Captain America, and it was a little daunting. She had a million thoughts running through her head right now, but pushed them down.

“As for dinner,” Natasha said, starting up the conversation again. “When I’m able to walk without hurting that is. I know a really nice diner in Brooklyn. It's close to my apartment there.”

Natasha had numerous safe houses and properties around the world, and the one she used when she was in New York was an out of the way area in Brooklyn. Private, only a few residents, but Natasha had paid good money to have it remodeled. The interior definitely didn’t match the exterior, which was perfect for Natasha. Still living in decent comfort, but not being detected at all. But her apartment paled in comparison to Avengers tower, and she wasn’t sure if she would be allowed to stay or not. She supposed that it would be a team decision.

"You live in Brooklyn?" Steve asked, clearly intrigued. He grew up in Brooklyn after all, and having a girl that stayed there probably peaked his interest even more. Natasha smiled at his reaction.  "When I'm in New York," Natasha said. "It's got an extra bedroom, since somebody put holes in your apartment in DC if you're interested. I think it's a few blocks away from where you were born actually. I read something about it in the Smithsonian."

"Huh," Steve said thoughtfully. "Pretty sure I will be staying here, but I will definitely think about it. Which diner were you thinking of? I was in Brooklyn for a little while before the invasion. Maybe I know it."

"It's called Astrid's," Natasha said. "Kinda a diner/bar place. Great burgers and wings, the game is always on. I had to threaten them to always put the Red Sox on when I show up, stupid Yankees fans that always go there. Usually can find a good game of pool or darts as well."

Steve hummed again. "I've passed by there every once in a while, but never been in." When she mentioned baseball though, he seemed to get even more excited. She knew he was a bit of a fan, but wasn’t sure how big. "You a baseball fan?"

"Yeah," Natasha said. "I love the concept of the game. The strategy with it. The old feel to it. Who knew a Russian would be in love with an American pastime. Red Sox are my team, I like watching Pedroia play. He's a good 2nd baseman, probably the best in the League. I have a place in Boston just outside of Fenway. I catch a couple games when I can, gives me some time to unwind."

"Even though the Dodgers are in California now, I still gotta support them," he confessed. "They were my team when I went under and they're my team now. Tony got me tickets to a game for my birthday. It was really great. But I've never been to a Red Sox game. Not in person, anyway."

“Well we’ll have to fix that then,” Natasha said with another smile. “So you can see who the superior baseball team really is.” Natasha was about to continue when Jarvis, Tony Stark’s very impressive AI, interrupted them.

_ "Pardon me, Captain," _ said JARVIS, his voice emanating from seemingly invisible speakers.  _ "But I have some news I believe you'd like to hear." _

"What is it, JARVIS?" Steve asked, looking up.

_ "Mr. Stark has returned." _

"You better get out of here," Natasha said, noting JARVIS's announcement. "Stark wasn't too happy the last time we saw each other. We best keep this news from him for a bit. Go see him, I'll catch up on some sleep."

It was true Natasha was tired, who wouldn't be after what she went through. She didn't want to go to sleep, she wanted to stay awake and talk with Steve, but she understood the necessity for her to heal.

"Alright," he said, pondering her statement for a moment. "But before I go..." He leaned forward and pressed a chaste kiss to Natasha's lips. He pulled away with a smile and took his leave. "Be back soon," he promised as the door closed behind him.

Natasha returned the kiss with as much passion as Steve and laid back on the bed as he left. "I'll be here," Natasha said, a goofy grin on her face. "Probably." As Steve left, Natasha kept that goofy grin on her face, completely smitten. "God what are you doing Natalia," she scolded herself, shifting herself in the bed to a more comfortable position. She wasn't able to finish her thought as fatigue took over her and she fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter contributions from A Velvet Rose & SarahCon


End file.
